Do men have to fight to be right?
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| Mon, 04-11-2005 - 3:36pm |
I need an answer in a context that I can weave into a conversation with my boyfriend - who is usually as sweet as can be but is very accident-prone, not very forward thinking, and um, not familiar with city ordinances regarding the disposal of toxic and/or flammable substances ;)
So...Why do men react to women getting irritated with their oafish behavior, by turning and launching their own personal attack? By oafish, I don't mean deliberate, mean-spirited things. I am talking about when they knock things over, break things, kill plants, ruin delicate china or brand new teflon with an SOS pad, rinse out a gascan in the kitchen sink, etc. And by irritated, I don't mean yelling or calling names. I mean getting that visibly disappointed/upset/frustrated look and explaining that this is really NOT how I wanted you to do this and I should have told you to do it this other way, but I really thought that you knew how to do this...so now there's a personal attack on ME and correct me if I'm wrong but it would be really, really dumb for me to end up apologizing for something HE did wrong. That has happened to me before, and it just didn't sit right. Made me resentful. What to do?? What to say??

Hugs. and good luck with the talk. I'm not sure what he's thinking, but he needs to take a chill pill. I mean, when you ruin/break/destroy things, you need to realize that yes, it can be an accident, but when it keeps happening, I wonder, how dense can you be?
BTW, I would NEVER marry someone like my father, cuz my father CAN be dense about things. intead I have always found men who were open to learning and growing. And LISTENING to me, when I say, "hey, don't do that, cuz you may break this or that".
Lastly. A man once said, "the best way to never have to do laundry is to shrink/dye/ruin your gf/w's favorite piece of clothing. The best way to never have to do dishes is to break her favorite piece of china. The best way to never do something.....is to act and look stupid so that SHE'LL do it and think you're too stupid to do it".
I wonder..........