What do you do when he's scared of sex

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2006
What do you do when he's scared of sex
2
Thu, 06-01-2006 - 9:15pm
I never dreamed in 1 million years that I would meet an amazing man, with 2 flaws. First he's a vergin, which isn't so bad, BUT secondly, he doesn't want sex! We've been together for 9 months and have done everything, except for the last bit. I've talked to him on average about once a month (when I crave it sooooooo bad)! Yet he cringes, and says he's not ready. We're both 21, how ready does he need to be? I really love him, but I'd really like to experience sex with him. Any advice how I can get him to be more comfortable about the topic? ANYTHING will help. I kind of think I've found the rare breed of male who does not want sex.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2004
Fri, 06-02-2006 - 7:53am

A few questions before I can answer.

If I understand correctly, you've done everything except intercourse. Is he comfortable with the sex play that you do have?

Has he told you why he's not feeling ready for sex? There are many different reasons that could potentially be causing his feelings, and without knowing what they are, it's very hard to give you some direction. Honestly, it could be anything from religious issues to fear of pregnancy.

Dress Up Games, Doll Makers and Cartoon Dolls @ The Doll Palace
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 06-02-2006 - 9:53am

iv_aisha2004...

PG agrees with what you've written.

Something else to consider might be the man's health...or (god forbid) there's a form of bacteria or virus in his system that embarrasses him? Most men don't like to talk about their internal problems...especially with women.

Perhaps pc_gal can convince him to at least get a physical or touch base with a doctor?

It's entirely possible that his lack of sexual desire could be connected with his health?
And if he can straighten out the problem, I'll bet pc_gal will be a lot happier?

Pianoguy