Texting - Good or Bad??

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2004
Texting - Good or Bad??
3
Thu, 06-08-2006 - 11:13am

Hey all! May seem like a somewhat frivolous subject, but I'd love to hear all of your opinions about text messaging. I was dating this guy a couple months ago and all he would do was text me! He never called and I began to see this as a red flag. I know men don't always enjoy chatting on the phone (or at least some), but is constantly texting a bad sign?

On the flip side, how does a guy take texting? I'm now talking to someone new (only been a week!) but I just started to text him today. I stopped myself because I didn't know how he would take it. He's at work so I don't want to call, but I don't want him to think I'm not interested or just being friendly. I'm probably overanalyzing as usual...

Any ideas or opinions?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-2005
Thu, 06-08-2006 - 2:10pm
I like getting texts from my boyfriend. We talk on the phone more, but it's nice to get sweet messages out of the blue from someone you like. As long as it doesn't become your main form of communication, I don't see any bad side to it.
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 06-08-2006 - 3:13pm

I don't think any form of communication is "good" or "bad" in and of itself...it's all in what you prefer and what works for you. If you enjoy texting then why make it an issue? But if you don't, TELL the other person and ask for the form of communication you prefer!

As for texting someone else, I would first *ask* to make sure it's ok. I personally don't like to text so I don't pay the extra $$ to include text messaging on my cell phone. So, it costs me ten cents every time someone texts me...not a huge amount of money, obviously, but I find it presumptuous when someone texts me without asking me first if it's ok.

As for showing interest, if you're answering or returning his calls, texts, whatever, promptly and enthusiastically, then you're showing interest. There's no need to do anything more than that, early on.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2004
Fri, 06-09-2006 - 1:21am

I think that, as long as it doesn't replace ACTUAL verbal communication (as it did with previous guy), that it's fine. Whatever works for both people.

However, I think there's a greater liklihood of lack of real communication taking place when people start a precendent of relying on any form of electronic communication. It's easy to become complacent about actually talking, wires getting crossed, miscommunications, etc.

My BF and I have never exchanged a text msg. Or an IM. Rarely an email. And, we have very little problem in communicating with each other, reaching each other. We use the phone like mature people, LOL.

I dunno know ... I guess being in my late-30s, I'm used to the "old fashioned" way of doing things. There was a point in time where we didn't have all this technology, emailing, IM'ing, texting, etc. Whereas, the "younger set" in their teens and 20s have always had email, etc when it comes to relationships.

And yes, I do think those were simpler times because, quite simply, people had to call each other to make plans or discuss things. I still subscribe to that level of simplicity. And quite frankly, it works. :)