Why do I care so much?
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Why do I care so much?
| Mon, 07-28-2003 - 11:59am |
Hi all,
OM went out of town for 5 days. And I'm fine with that--really I could use the break. But there is a chance he will see his ex...
I asked him if he wanted to see her, and he said "no. are you being jealous??" So I told him, "well, if you see her, just don't tell me..."
But, my goodness, I am jealous. And I do want to know. But what is really the point? I'm the one who is having the A. I'm the one who wants to end things...boy, I sure know how to send mixed signals.
I'm going to try my hardest not to ask, but...curiosity is a killer.
Alameda

Oh, Alameda... how often in our lives have we wanted to be Spock, and look at everything from a logical, non-emotional standpoint?
Of course, if you do decide to ask him if he saw her, be sure you actually want to hear the response. It sounds like he has no plans and no interest in seeing her, but she may want to see him... and sometimes when two people have a history together, they are still drawn towards each other even when the R is over.
That's not to make you feel bad! That's just to point out that there could be a good chance he WILL see her, but I doubt it would change anything about how he feels about YOU. If you knew he saw her, would it change how you felt about him? If not -- and it might just upset you -- then bite thy tongue! lol...
take care, Alameda!
-lily
I have battled feelings of jealousy (for lack of a better term) during a past EMA. I think because I knew that they had a child together, and thus this connection existed that I could never have with him (he was separated and in process of getting a divorce).
My advice is to ask yourself why, if your OM sees his ex, it would bother you so much? It sounds like there is something you feel insecure about, or unsure of. Perhaps it's because of your status, or some nagging doubts? Just guessing, obviously.
In my current (and still fairly new) EMA, I don't really have too much jealousy. We are both married, though I am far more happy with my DH than his is with his DW. Yet, I get jealous about the OW he was seeing at his job. He broke it off with her prior to becoming involved with me, but since OW is a close friend of his W, he has to be careful not to piss her off too much. It's funny, cause I know he cares about me a great deal, and since I know the OW (we are even friendly), I know that I am prettier, sexier, etc. -- I hope that doesn't sound conceited -- yet I still find myself worrying from time to time.
Anyways, many of us have battled the very feelings you have right now -- hang tough!