So, how do I begin????
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| Mon, 08-11-2003 - 1:15am |
So the other day, the OM told me that he's going to go back to the same university that I am going to and take up teaching which is the same thing that I am taking (Remember he's an optician so it's not like he needs a career). I am like 70% sure that I want to start something with him but that's where I need your advice. How do I do that? Because of where we both work (which is the only times we see each other) we are never alone. There is always someone else around. I want to let him know that I am attracted to him and interested in starting something. Even though he has a g/f, I know that he is open to an affair on her (long story......).
So what are your stories? How'd you start your A's? How do you suggest that I start mine? I was thinking of asking for his email address and taking it that way but I'd like other options.
As always, thanks for your advice and non-judgemental support. It's nice to have that!
hugs

How did my A start? Well, honestly, it just happened. I was looking for an A, but never expected to find OM. We met, sparks, passion and all that happened and next thing you know, he's agreeing to be my man on the side.
We're currently going through a tough patch. He can't seem to handle being the OM... Our A seemed to be over last week, but now I'm not so sure... One thing I have learnt is that there are going to be tough spots. He's single, he wants more from me, and I'm not able to give more at this time. So, my story of my A isn't over... Just not knowing where things are headed right now, but that's a story for anyone who's wondering what happens when the OM wants more.
Just go with the flow of your prospective A. Flirt, hint... Good luck! ~passion
So, my advice? Call him for something dumb and just strike up a conversation - things will go from there! Good luck!
Good luck to you -- keep us posted as to how it's going! ;)
One more question....I've heard that if you are going to have an A or are in an A, do not tell anyone about it because once it becomes known (even if it's only by one other trusted friend) then the relationship is doomed to fail. Is that true? My manager at work is an amazing woman and we talk alot and she also sees the sparks between me and this guy. I think it's be hard not to tell her if something does happen because I tell her everything that happens in my life. But if an A does start, I don't want it to get out all over town (obviously!) so I was just wondering how true that saying is.
Thanks guys for your responses and I think I might be here for the long haul now!!!!
hugs
I would have kept my mouth
shut about OM. Because I
told someone about my OM,
I'm paranoid she'll let it
come out. I thought I could
trust her, but she's broken
my trust over something
smaller than this just
recently, and I'm now sure
she's going to open her
mouth. That said, in my
opinion keep it here if
you need someone to talk
to about your A! ~passion
So finally after he brushed my hair from my eyes one night :::Sigh::::: I KNEW he wanted more.....One night after leaving a bar (group of couples all went out) I quickly said "we need to talk" It took us three weeks to find a time we could meet.
We met in a parking lot, and sat in my truck and talked. Talked about what we had been feeling, etc. We both decided that we couldn't risk losing our families (He has been married for 17 years, me and h for 10..together for 17. Even though we both had really strong feelings for each other. We both thought we were okay with it...and no damage had been done. We shared one really romantic kiss.....and that was it..... :::::::deep breath::::::
Our children go to the same school....are involved in same activities....so I saw/see him all the time. A few days later he told me he couldn't stop thinking of me, and that he loved me. I emailed a friend of mine (figured it would be safe) and told her what he had said.
That night was the children's christmas show. I had to run to the store before hand, and so I told H i would meet him there.....when I got there, I was talking to MM wife when he came up from behind and told me H KNOWS! He read my email :O(
So....be VERY CAREFUL what you write....who you talk to ......I NEVER would have dreamed in a million years he would have checked up on me. He never had any interest in my online doings....I have always been the faithful little housewife....devoted mom to four...he was my one and only love......He had no reason to check on me....he just had a feeling in his gut.
Good Luck....oh how I miss that excitement! Although I still get butterflies everytime I see MM.
Ok, so alot of you talked about covering my tracks. What is the best way to do that? How do I keep him from finding this message board? My email is protected well enough that he won't ever figure out the password (he's not too computer literate!!!lol). As for my town.....I live in a city of about 55,000 so it's not that big. Plus we work in the busiest mall in the city so I guess going for lunch at the food court isn't a good idea!! I want to do this smart but I need advice from you guys. I've never done this before.
thanks