trying to hang in there... sooooooo hard

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-05-2004
trying to hang in there... sooooooo hard
7
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 2:01am
I am really getting wore thin on the patience. I don't know how much longer I can do this. Seems like I am the only one wanting this now. No contact is no good! I think it causes separation not togetherness. MM man is my best friend and even if we had no sex just talking would make me happy. grrrrrrrrrrr I have got to do something. Can't lose him without a fight! I know I need him in my life! Help before I do something stupid!
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2003
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 6:56am
Hang in there. We all know that this can be an emotional rollercoaster. Try to spend time with friends and stay busy. This time will pass.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2003
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 7:54am
Hi xxx, we all know NC is the hardest thing to go thru. But just try to stay calm and let him have his time to get his head together. You know if he loves you, he will be back. But he has to get his head around some things first. Don't tell yourself that separation means he will forget about you. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, this you must remember. Let them go, they will come back to you.

You know he cares deeply about you but he is going thru a separation or whatever, believe me, BTDT, it is very difficult time to go thru.

I went thru 8 weeks of NC this fall, and it was the hardest thing I've ever done probably. The only thing I will say is if you really can't resist the urge to contact him, just keep it simple, something like "thinking about you, hope everything is okay with you". That's what I did only a couple of times during the 8 weeks when I was at my wits end.

But at the end of the tunnel hopefully things will work out. Take care,

Dusty
xxxx
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 8:30am
Think of the build up when you are back together. I am sure you'll be peeling each other's skin off. LOL Hang in there.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-05-2004
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 1:54pm
man, you guys are right! I got to keep my stuff together because he is going to need me to cheer him up. But there is noway I can go 8 weeks. !!!!!!!!! 4 days is my limit and it is double that. I want to scream and cry and tell him he isn't being fair to me. I am afraid that would just make him not want to talk to me because it would add stress. But I should have the right to express how I feel . I just hope he calls soon. when he called last time I told him I didn't know whether my granddaughter was going to make it in this world very much longer. I was crying and I could hear him taking deep breaths. I know he was holding back his tears for me. I know this is a very hard time for both of us.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-10-2004
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 2:04pm
XXX - I'm in the same boat and hating every minute of it. Feel free to keep commiserating!! If I weren't getting so low, I'd try to dive into a book - it's just not the same as MM though!! LOL

Keep your chin up - I'm trying to think about the reunion!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-05-2004
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 3:15pm
WOW , HE CALLED !!! I am feeling happy now. At least I know he still cares and what he has been doing . He told me he has started his bankrupcy ! He tried everyway he could to figure out how not to . I feel bad for him, that he has to go through this. But I feel like all this hard stuff is the only way he will make the big change he needs in his life. He is the kind that needs a push to except change. I told him that no contact thing was killing me. That I couldn't do it. He said I needed to give him time to take care of the stuff he needs to take care of. I told him I was trying . He said he thought it had only been 4 days since he talked to me. He must be losing it! I told him it was double that. He said he was sorry. He said he will try to come see me monday . I will be wishing for that moment when we can hold each other again. I know this is definately true love. This has got to be happening to make us stronger . A stronger union together.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2003
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 3:19pm
I'm real happy for you that he called and see, we told you, its gonna take him some time to work thru his issues and everything.

Just have faith and things will be okay !! Glad you're cheered up!!

Dusty
xxxx