Safe locations to be with each other

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2008
Safe locations to be with each other
8
Fri, 02-06-2009 - 1:31pm

I have been seeing a married woman for several months now. Our lives are both very busy and finding time to be together is often a challenge. We are very cautious and careful about where and how we meet but finding it quite a challenge - we both live in the same community.

If we get to meet for an hour or two we go to a park or the beach and sit together - great for kissing and hugging but too dangerous for outright sex. Perhaps once a month we are able to get away and find a hotel room where we can have either a full afternoon or evening together. This isn't easy either as we don't want to raise any alarms. She can't travel very far and I have to be careful about strange hotel charges appearing on a statement - I always pay cash.

I realize everyones circumstances are different but I would really appreciate knowing how others manage to get away to be together in a safe and secure location. Are hotel rooms the only viable option?

We would love to come up with some solution that works for us. Thanks all and I apologize if this question has been asked before.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2008
Fri, 02-06-2009 - 1:50pm
There's no such thing as a safe location. It all just depends on how cunning, manipulative, sneaky and a good liar two people are. But, I must caution you, if someone smell something fishy and try to do some detective work, then it's just a matter of "when" not "if" you get caught. My sister got caught 'cause her H followed her in a friends car to the beach where they would just kiss and hold each other with her AP. So, even that is not a safe place.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2008
Fri, 02-06-2009 - 2:00pm
Thanks goddess. I appreciate what you are saying. There is no place that would be considered "safe". You exercise extreme caution but everything you do together is a risk. We try to be careful but it does get frustrating at times. I was just curious what others have found to be as "safe" as you can be. Are hotel rooms the only or best option? so far this seems to be the case for us.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2009
Sat, 02-07-2009 - 9:16am

I am guessing that you are both M? If you are S why don't you bring her back to your place?

My MM and I live in different cities but we see each other fairly often, it does make it easier. When he's here he just stays at my house, when I am there I am in a hotel room anyway so he just invents some 'business trip' and stays over with me. So yes, hotels are the best (safest) option for extended time together.

Hugs to you and good luck...

trix xo

Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it is about learning to
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2009
Sat, 02-07-2009 - 2:42pm
Yea that worked great till spouse came home.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2000
Sat, 02-07-2009 - 5:48pm
Since neither of you is single, I don't know what other option you would have besides a hotel.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-01-2009
Sat, 02-07-2009 - 6:51pm

For our daytime meetings we ended up going to a couple of national parks, where we could disappear into the trees a bit.


Great for having privacy, except for the occasional bushwalker, although

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-01-2008
Mon, 02-09-2009 - 2:24am

I work with my AP, so it's not unusual for either of us to be seen in the other's vehicle.


Being that we work for ourselves, we aren't slaves to the timeclock, so we have a lot of freedom to be together.

Pink Passion Flower

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2008
Thu, 02-12-2009 - 11:54am

Hi Trixie. Yes we are both MM so caution and discretion are a must. Being as we both live in the same city it does pose some challenges. One good thing about being close is we can get away for an hour or two 2-3 times per week and just be together say at the beach or a park. It gives us a chance to hold hands, hug and steal a kiss.

About once a month I also "invent" a business trip, we get a nice hotel room and spend the night. I consider our time together precious and a gift every moment we are together. I think we will just have to consider ourselves fortunate and take what we can get.

Thanks