Like a movie (Is anyone here a LAWYER?)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2006
Like a movie (Is anyone here a LAWYER?)
29
Sat, 02-21-2009 - 2:09am

Hi everyone.

~vanillabeanie

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2004
Sat, 02-21-2009 - 2:01pm

Hi Vanillabeanie,


I think right now would be the best time to step back from the situation with this man.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2008
Sat, 02-21-2009 - 7:57pm

I’m not sure what you’re asking.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2006
Sat, 02-21-2009 - 10:27pm

Wow eco, you hardly make this message board a supportive one!

~vanillabeanie
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2006
Sat, 02-21-2009 - 10:52pm
Hi jen36jen, thanks for your message.
~vanillabeanie
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2008
Sat, 02-21-2009 - 11:12pm

“Support” does not = telling you what you WANT to hear.


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2006
Sat, 02-21-2009 - 11:30pm

"From a legal standpoint..." What are you talking about?

~vanillabeanie
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2007
Sun, 02-22-2009 - 1:15am

Hi Vanilla -


Well I'm no lawyer - and honestly - even if someone on the board were one - without knowing the state we are dealing with and probably alot of other factors - I'm not sure anyone would want to give too much legal advice -but I would think that you are probably looking at nothing less than six months to a year on this one - just kinda the way things tend to go -you know??


In the meantime - you are doing the right thing by stepping back - letting him deal with things as he needs to - he really needs to be supportive to his W and child right now - and once all of this gets wrapped up-

lightning in my heart

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2006
Sun, 02-22-2009 - 2:26am

Hi Tgr, thank you for your post.

~vanillabeanie
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-24-2009
Sun, 02-22-2009 - 12:27pm

The title of your post asks “Is anyone here a lawyer?”.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-26-2003
Sun, 02-22-2009 - 2:42pm

<<<

When he talks about the possibility of losing the rights to be with his child as a result of our relationship, his voice quivers and it kills me. So this is the only way to make sure his wife can't take his child away.>>>>

Either your AP has a crappy attorney or your AP is feeding you line after line of BS. I'm guessing on the latter.

Custody in any state is determined based on the *best interests of the child,* regardless of whether one of the parents is having an extramarital relationship. For example, if the *mother* was the one having the affair, BUT the children were better off living with the mother - then most likely the parents would share custody with the mother getting physical custody. BUT let's say it could be proven that the mother's boyfriend was abusive though, then I could see their being an issue with custody. The issue of custody in either scenerio still has *nothing* to do with adultery though.

Do you honestly believe the court is going to "punish" a cheating spouse because of an affair as it relates to custody/visitation? That's ridiculous, especially since it is the child who would suffer and that's just not the way it goes down. Sorry. If you don't believe me, go make an appointment for a legal consultation.

He's lying to you. He spoke to an attorney and he's "terrified of losing custody?" That's a load of BS -- your AP never spoke to an attorney.

But if it makes you happy believing all the BS he's feeding you, then . . . .




Edited 2/22/2009 3:39 pm ET by longisland2004

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