What is Her Motive?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2007
What is Her Motive?
9
Mon, 10-26-2009 - 9:41pm
Since i have last posted a while back about exiting my A, i have done pretty well, imo. Very limited contact, casual behavior when we see each other...no "extras" being given back and forth to each other..its been good for me..my heart still gets a little twisted, but i'm a lot more emotionally stronger than i was.
However, his WIFE got in touch with me last week. She's wanting to know if i want to display my art stuff at a craft fair. Now why in the world out of the blue would she be asking ME of all people if i want to do something with HER???? I'm very suspicious...Did he tell her something? Does she think she's gonna get info outta me about something?? Altho it a wonderful chance for me, and i would love the opportunity to display my items, i dont know about doing so with her. She always rubbed me the wrong way.
But i'm thinking i oughta just think about myself and my family here, and making money for x-mas. And take advantage of her offer, too.
But i really dont know if it's a good idea or not.


Edited 10/26/2009 9:42 pm ET by emscemily
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2009
Tue, 10-27-2009 - 6:25am
Does xAP's W know about the A? If not, I don't see any harm. Perhaps you can send a surrogate in your place?
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2007
Tue, 10-27-2009 - 7:18am
yeah, actually she has accused us of it numerous times over the last two years. and up until this past summer, she would have nothing to do with me. even when i would see her in public way back when, she wouldn't even say anything to me at all..not even a hello, and she didn't even know me back then.. she just sat there and stared. Most people i meet, they at least will say hello to me...whether i know them or not..its just common courtesy.
That's why i am so surprised that all of a sudden, she's acting like she's my friend. Very odd, imo.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-10-2009
Tue, 10-27-2009 - 8:18am
If your gut instinct is telling you something...you are probably right. Im not sure what you should do tho lol
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2008
Tue, 10-27-2009 - 11:30am
I would really think twice before doing this craft fair. I read where someone suggested sending a surrogate? Good idea if possible. I am sure she still is suspicious of you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2007
Fri, 10-30-2009 - 9:30pm
Well, her and i have been communicating about the bazaar. I asked her to call me about it so we could talk about the details, and lo and behold, she has HIM call me! That was a shock...i was hoping to leave him out of this. Btw, it wont be just me and her anymore there at the bazaar... some of our friends are crafters and joining us too, so that's a relief i wont have to be alone with her all day. I am just annoyed HE would call me instead of her. He knows i want some distance...and then sometimes i think i should just forget the whole thing. But i need the money for the holidays, and this is a really BIG fair happening. I'm thinking of the chance i would have to show my artworks off. I am trying to keep that frame of mind for myself...i want to be successful at this, and i need to give myself a chance. She introduced me to this chance i have and i think i should take it, regardless of him and her.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-10-2009
Fri, 10-30-2009 - 11:03pm
My gut tells me you should not go.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2007
Sat, 10-31-2009 - 10:10am
She would have exploded by now, believe me... and this is her place of employment too, so the chances of that happening are very slim to none. If anything, she will explode at HIM, later on when they are alone. I know she's done that before. And i found out i can have a table on the opposite side of the building too, and not have to deal with her or him.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2009
Sat, 10-31-2009 - 3:33pm

I would contact her-asking questions about the event, commission, fees, set-up, etc.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2007
Sat, 10-31-2009 - 4:23pm
well thats what i was trying to do.. just keep this mine and her thing. And she approached ME with the idea..and she bought the table already, she offered to from the beginning....now after thinking about it, HE should have told her it was not a good idea before she asked me to join her, imo. Makes me think maybe for him, the A is not over (in his mind or heart) being's as HE called me about it instead of her. SHE should have called me, not him.. Now i am wondering what HIS motive is in this adventure.....is he trying to suck me back in emotionally? Of course, he is kinda spineless, and maybe she goaded him into it.
My interest in this endeavor is purely for financial reasons.