Dec. is a difficult month

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-24-2009
Dec. is a difficult month
5
Sat, 12-12-2009 - 8:56am

well here we are again in the month of december when things get hectic with family and kids, which means limited or no contact with SM. I know he is available when I can get out since he is single but he will have alot of time on his hands.


~Layla~
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2003
Sat, 12-12-2009 - 12:47pm

Hi layla,


Hmmm, does anyone else dread December? That would be a resounding YES. I've been having difficulties, period...but December really is the icing on the cake.


Both of my children were born in December. My DS lives fairly close, but due to "legal" issues..it's difficult to see him very often. My DD lives far away and she's still angry that I left her father although I know she does still love me :0)


AP/BF let me know the other day that I will most likely be alone for the holidays. Apparently not only are his kids coming home, but his in-laws will be around as well.


I so realize that Christmas is (traditionally) family time, but as his M is definitely NOT traditional, and we did spend last Christmas together, I felt like I'd been hit with a brick when he told me. This was after my DS told me that he was planning on having an alone Christmas with his GF and DD.


Last but not least, my mother died at Christmas many years ago and honestly? I've never really recovered from that either.


So yes, I dread December. Heck, I hate December! I just wish I could go to sleep and wake up in January!!!


Hang in there,


benska

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-07-2009
Sun, 12-13-2009 - 1:44am

Sorry Benska about your Mom. That is very difficult.

Unfortunately Holidays are a part of our AP's world. And ours too....please try to not let it get you so down...for the first time I will be alone on Christmas Day and I plan to sit by the fire and look at my tree, relax and be glad my kids are enjoying the day with X's family....Even if you are not with the man you love it Doesn't mean you are forgotten. My lover and I meet this week and then will see one another for Christmas Eve breakfast just like last year. And we live in different states. You can make your own new Traditions and maybe things will change and you will get to see him.

Take Care.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
Sun, 12-13-2009 - 10:48am

Its both summer and winter vaccations that are tough.I am planning to make a big change this winter and that is to start going to bed early at night as its the nights that are the hardest.During the day there are enough distractions but come evening,i am engulfed with my AP's thoughts and miss him like crazy.

i guess this is a good test for us to see that if i or AP miss each other enough to continue and is it wirth it afterall?

I will be around the board more often during these holidays.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2009
Thu, 12-17-2009 - 9:13am
Yes! December stinks :(.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-14-2009
Thu, 12-17-2009 - 10:22am
I know how you feel. I am in an identical A as you. My AP is single....in fact, newly divorced, so this is his first Christmas alone. I hate the fact that he has to spend Christmas alone, guilty because I can't make it better for him, and worried that in his depression of being alone and the situation of our A will lead him to decide to find someone who is more available to him. We did have a WONDERFUL day together yesterday. We exchanged gifts, and just had a great day of being together. All I can do is just wish the holidays to HURRY the HECK up and be over!