Mind Games ???
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Mind Games ???
| Thu, 06-03-2010 - 4:06pm |
I am so frustrated right now and am about to BLOW! Is this just mind games or what??
| Thu, 06-03-2010 - 4:06pm |
I am so frustrated right now and am about to BLOW! Is this just mind games or what??
Proud to be a
You've
I would suggets kicking him in the balls, then offering him something for the pain again.
Ugh, another hot and cold guy!
This seems to be far too common. The hot and cold is definitely how my AP has been acting for the past month and a half, ever since he suddenly started feeling guilty and wasn't sure if he could do this (he decided he did want to keep seeing me but to slow it down and dial down the intensity). Since that conversation, some days he's hot, and the conversation is fun, he kisses me, we fool around, and then other days he's cold, barely talks to me, and I think goes out of his way not to be around me (we work temporarily at the same place).
I know how much it hurts when they do that! I don't know what it is. I wanted to post a question to the group and ask for ideas on why.
I wonder if it has to do with the intensity of the A, that they need to back up and get some distance. I mean, just to make a somewhat stereotypical statement, guys aren't necessarily the 'best' at relationships, and here they are in one committed one with their SO, and then an A on the side! Plus I think often the women fall a little bit harder and our emotions get entangled a bit more than them.
But it really, really sucks, and breaks my heart when he is acting cold to me.
Yesterday there was a perfect opportunity for me to call him out on it and I did. I said that he was either hot or cold with me and I never knew what I was walking in to when I came in to work. He acknowledged that he was like that, and then it led to me saying my contract was up next week and he was going to have to figure out if he wanted to still see me after (I'm going to create a separate post about this so I don't ramble on in your message stream!).
So, I think it's kinda a defense mechanism, for whatever reason. It just sucks that I'm always 'hot, and he swings back and forth. Ugh.
Best of luck crazy, I know, this stuff makes me a crazy girl for sure too!!! You're not alone :)
*hugs*