Pfffft

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2010
Pfffft
12
Wed, 09-01-2010 - 3:39am

Well thats all I can say is 'Pffft' and shrug....


He is interstate on business today (Wed). This week our contact has been:


Monday- a 5min call to cancel our lunch on Tuesday. I asked why I hadnt heard from him last Friday- he said

You are what you consistently do

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2010
Wed, 09-01-2010 - 7:52am

You know, by waiting, you could change your mind by next week. I know breaking up by e-mail seems like you won't be able to say everything you want to say, but it's possible that you would actually be able to say more - if you get it all in one e-mail. In person, he could just close up as soon as you say you're ending it and you still won't be able to say everything you want to say (or he won't really be hearing you even if you do say it). Are you sure that deep down under there you aren't just hoping that he will talk you out of it? When we're really ready to end it, we don't want them to say anything to change our minds, and we actually know that nothing they say WILL change our minds.

I'm sorry this is all still hurting you Iggy! I hope you do what it is that is best for you and your life sweetie. Wishing you strength. ♥

Proud to be a





You've got a lot of choices. If getting out of bed in the morning is a chore and you're not smiling on a regular basis, try another choice. ~Steven D. Woodhull

Proud to be a





You've

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2010
Wed, 09-01-2010 - 8:01am

(HUGS) Iggy... just hate the way this all keep dragging on for you...

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-15-2006
Wed, 09-01-2010 - 9:18am

Arrrggghhhh!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2010
Wed, 09-01-2010 - 10:16pm

I hear what you are saying Clear- but Im not a 'cut and ignore' sorta gal. I wish I was- but Im not. And while reading my post gives an insight into this week, it doesnt really show the history of our A. I cant just ignore and walk- gosh I wish I could.


Lexi- ever sage!

You are what you consistently do
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-15-2006
Thu, 09-02-2010 - 9:27am

"I have drafted the email saying everything I want to say"


Be sure to be honest with yourself on what response you really want here.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2010
Thu, 09-02-2010 - 9:24pm

I understand what you are saying. I certainly have thought this through and while it breaks my heart, I cant see any other option. The A has been so wonderful (in parts) but the majority of it has been me waiting for him to throw some crumbs my way. Its so different to how it was in the past- and occasionally I see glimpses of that again- but I have to accept that the A has settled into a routine.


A routine where I am a thing he keeps in his back pocket to bring out when he needs a lift, needs atention or needs distraction. I cant live that way- particularly when my own H has become so attentive lately, it breaks my heart knowing that I could break his- and for what?

You are what you consistently do
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2003
Thu, 09-02-2010 - 10:14pm

Wow iggy, I'm speechless.


And now off I go to have a good cry....damn, that's reality biting you in the butt, isn't it? I'm so sorry.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2010
Thu, 09-02-2010 - 10:33pm

I got a laugh out of the "Pfffft."

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2010
Fri, 09-03-2010 - 11:14pm

Game plan my friend? Is to not go totally insane!


Ok here is my brain chatter- just this morning!


Ok, the prick didnt bother texting at all yesterday- Im done with this- I'll ask to meet him Mon/Tue at a park so I can say bye (and maybe get teary- hence a nonpublic setting). Yes thats what I'll do.


Hang on- he may not meet me in a park. He'll

You are what you consistently do
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2010
Sat, 09-04-2010 - 12:54am

I think you need to make an effort to end it if that is what you really want. I hate the thought of being rejected - ever. So in my mind, while I knew it was coming to an end and not entirely because of me I'd pull the plug before he could. It's just my thought process. I did it with AP about 2 weeks in. I thought for sure he was going to end things when his SO came back from a girls week away. Her first day back I emailed and ended it. Told him I couldn't do it. He taunted me for hours the next week, and here we are 3.5 months later - ugh, while at times I totally enjoy it, sometimes I'd like to kick my own ass. But from my perspective, I'd end it - anyway I knew would work best. Then I KNEW it was my choice and AP wasn't rejecting me. But I have this huge fear of rejection/failure. Like serious issues - anxiety attack type fear.

Good luck on whatever you do. Such a hard, hard decision.

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