Help! Relationship trouble

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-19-2003
Help! Relationship trouble
5
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 9:59am
I am a big idiot and I just may have ruined a great relationship. Last night, at my boyfriend's house I managed to lock my keys in my car. My boyfriend was taking me back to my place to get a set of spare keys. It was really late and he had to be up really early. I felt so bad about it and I was apoligizing to him. I said I'm sorry and ended the sentence meaning to say his name but for some reason my ex's name came out. I know I hurt him really bad and I really can't believe i said it. I don't want to lose him and I tried really hard last night to prove to him that it was him that i want to be with and not my ex. I'm not really sure if he is intending on breaking it off or not. He gave me signs that he wanted to continue. However, if we continue, I don't feel like our relationship will be the same. Does anyone have any advice that may help us build back our relationship. Thanks!
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-20-2003
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 11:36am
Have you talked to him today? How was his mood? Did he seem like he was still upset about what happened last night?

While you had a slip up in saying the wrong name - I don't think that the relationship is doomed. His feelings might be hurt but I don't think that he will end his relationship with you as a result.

If I were you - I would say to him again that I was truly sorry for calling him the wrong name but in no way does that mean that I want to be with my ex. Perhaps you can get him a card (one of those "between me & you" - Hallmark) and write alittle note inside stating that you are sorry and how much you care about him and value the relationship.

Don't worry...everything will be okay!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-19-2003
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 12:29pm
I just talked to him on the phone. We talked for quite a while. He was still pretty mad and upset. I'm supposed to come over his house tonight and tell him the person who in my heart I love. I love him alot and my instant response is just tell him its him. But i did blurt out my ex's name and i really want to think hard about this one and figure out why i said it. I don't want to hurt my boyfriend but i owe it to him to find out what's really in my heart. I'm in for a really hard day. Thanks for your advice.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 1:51pm
Habit - how long were you with your ex? Sometimes it is only a slip of the tongue, a mental thing.


Carrie

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-19-2003
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 2:57pm
I was with my ex for about a year and a half. I've been with my current boyfriend about a month and a half. I started dating my boyfriend about 2 weeks after my ex and i broke up. I really think it may have been a slip of the tongue but either way it hurt him alot and I don't think he would understand it being a slip of the tongue because its never happened even on the first few dates. He knows that just the fact that I hurt him so much makes my heart ache too. Hopefully, this will work out and we'll be stronger because of it. I'll make sure to post tommorow what happens tonight.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2003
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 4:07pm
If you feel you have to do some 'soul searching', there may be something more than just a slip of the tongue. But the slip in and of itself is meaningless. It happened to me, to call a boyfriend with the former boyfriend's name. No biggie, and nobody got upset. I would not have wanted the former boyfriend back anyway, he was some unreliable jerk, and I was very happy in my new relationship.

Just be nice with your boyfriend and he will get over it. Also, make sure you don't get all worked up over this, or there may be other slips. Stress plays funny tricks.