Confused
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Confused
| Tue, 12-16-2003 - 10:43am |
I need some advice from anyone because like I said I am completely confused. Here is the backstory I met this guy about 6 months ago when we were living in the same apartment complex his friend introduced us because he was really shy and the moment I met him it was love at first sight. We immediantly starting hanging out everyday and we had a really intense week. When we finally slept together he acted fine the next morning but later in the day when we were out he acted distant and then later that night he said we could not see each other anymore and we could not speak to each other when we saw each other. I later found out he had gotten back together with his ex girlfriend. About 2 months went by and I hadn't really spoken to him and one night I had my balconey door open and he starts yelling my name so I come out and he starts talking like nothing happened then he's like I'll talk to you later and of course he didn't he would only occasionally wave but that was about it. I moved out of the apartment complex this past October and around the beginning of November he called me and was like I heard you moved blah blah blah and acted like nothing had happened and so he invited me over and I went because I am so into him and we slept together and I spent the night I tried to leave because I didn't want to make him uncomfortable but he insisted that I stayed and he held me all night it was wonderful then when I left around 7am I expected him to call me he didn't about a week later I saw him at the grocery store and he said he moved to my town back with his parents and that is about all he said to me. Then later that week he came into the car dealership that I was working at and he knew I worked there and he was looking at trucks he was sitting pratically right next to me and he wouldn't even speak to me except when I said hello but even then he seemed hostile and when he left he didn't even say goodbye which hurt. Later that night he called me and wanted to know if I wanted to do something and it was already around 8;30pm so I was like give me thirty minutes and he came and picked me up he was so shy acting and he didn't have any specific plans for somewhere to go so we just drove around for probably two hours in his truck then he was like I am gonna go ahead and take you home and I was like what because I assumed he called me to have sex.So I kept hinting that I wanted to sleep with him and he didn't get it until I just came right out and said it.I asked him didn't he assume we were going to have sex and he said no and he wasn't lying because we had to stop and get condoms. So we went back to his old apartment and we had quickie sex on the floor in his old room and it was amazing and then we left and we did talk a little on the way back to my house but he seemed uncomfortable he dropped me off and I of course assumed he would call me he didn't so about a week later I called him and he sounded genuinely happy to hear from me but he said he has been busy that is why he hadn't called me and I asked him if we could go ahead and make plans he said he couldn't say right now but would definately call me before Thanksgiving which was three days away he never did.I am not nieve I know no one is that busy so I gave up that is the last time I spoke with him. But probably once a week I see him driving through town and he doesn't acknowledge me nor do I him. But regarding the girlfriend he ditched me for he said he is not seeing her anymore and he only went back with her because her 4 year old daughter was calling him daddy which he isn't and I do believe him. I would think he was just using me for sex but it is obvious he isn't because he would call me to hook up. My other thought is he is really shy and feels uncomfortable around me because we basically starting a really passionate affair really fast and he had said previously he just doesn't hop into bed with someone. My last theory is that he may be bisexual because his best friend a couple of months ago was bisexual and he always is bashing gays and when I ask him about his friend he said that when he found out he stopped hanging out with him but that is a lie because back in September he told me he was bi but continued to hang out with him. I apologize for the long letter I am sure that no one is really interested but I really need some help I am in love with this guy and everyday I can't stop thinking about him and it hurts me so much when he igmores me. Please help

You have indicated that you are open for just sex by your behavior and your communication so he doesn't respect you.
I say let this one go unless you want to be his doormat.
Are you looking for a relationship? If so you are going about it all wrong.
You don't have a relationship with this guy. (Erin where are you?)
Carrie
he pursued sex...and you offered it up.
He's never pursued dating..and if you think offering sex is going to make him pursue dating, you're out of your mind.
The use he has for you is sexual - if he has nothing better to do. Otherwise, he's not aware that you're in existence, or doesn't want to be bothered acknowledging your existence.
You're not in love with him...you're in love with the idea of being in love, being loved back and "having a relationship". Sex isn't a relationship - it's physical gratification. And you being available for physical gratification...is never going to get you a relationship. Not with him, or anybody else.
Erin
quickblade14@hotmail.com