don't know what to do
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don't know what to do
| Sun, 12-21-2003 - 10:21pm |
Just got out of an off and on 6 year relationship. FOr the past year we have been living together. He told me that we are not going to be together. I find myself calling him and saying I want to have sex with him just so I can see him. I know he is with another woman, (mother of his child), and knowing he is over there kills me. I find myself calling over there to speak to him, just because I hate the fact that he's not with me. I love this man so much, and the thought of him not being with me makes me feel useless. Our relationship was great for a while, but I found out that he has cheated and I couldn't trust him. He would be mad, because I didn't want him to go anywhere, so we would fight. On few occasions, he stayed out until 6 in the morning, and I found numbers to meet locals on the telephone. When I do talk to him, he says he misses me, and that he just needs time away. This time away is killing me. And if he just needs time away than why is he with someone else? Please help

It really sounds like he's jerking you around.
he has said he doesn't want you. he is using you for sex because you're pathetically offering your body to him.
he's also a liar and a cheat.
get your own life and own interests or you will never escape the pattern of clinging to men who treat you like crap.
Sorry if this sounds blunt, but I'm in a hurry.....
Please, please work on your self-esteem - this is the core to everything you feel and why. By seeing him and continuing to sleep with him, you are telling the universe & him (giving him permission) that it's ok for people to cheat.
How to you go from being in his life to not be, you just do it. You talk to yourself. You tell yourself you are worth more, you work on your self-esteem. You realize that you can't love him enough, give him your body enough, tempt him with great sex to *steal him away* to make him WANT you. If you do that and you get want you think you want, then won't you ALWAYS, ALWAYS wonder if some other woman will have the same effect on him because he's WEAK???
Sorry, as I said I am in a hurry. I know you hurt. I know you are in pain. I know you are filled with grief. Feel it, express it, embrace it, but stop calling him, stop seeing him. You are the only one that is getting hurt in this triangle.
My best to you.
Carrie
Carrie