Husband not in love...

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2004
Husband not in love...
1
Thu, 04-01-2004 - 11:34am
Here is the situation. We have almost been married for 2 years. Lately my husband has been withdrawn. We have talked and he said that he is not in love with me anymore. He says he loves me and cares for me, but not the way a husband should love a wife. A little background...he has NEVER been in a long relationship and honestly, our relationship of 4.5 years is the longest I have ever been in before also. I was married once before and met my husband then. He says that he doesnt want to kiss me or hug me or cuddle with me anymore, but that its nothing that I have done. I have been the best wife to him. He now suggests that he sleep in the spare bedroom and that we try living our own lives in the same house. Reason...we have home together, and neither one of us can afford to live on our own. Plus I run a business out of my home and he said there is no way he would take that away from me. I am just so confused as to what I should do??? Just let things fade away or what? I metioned maybe us having time apart, but how do we do that living under that same roof? HELP!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Thu, 04-01-2004 - 2:24pm
Counseling, counseling, counseling, couples can fall in love again and do fall in love again. It takes some work though.

Reading material:

A Couple's Guide to Communication, John Mordechai Gottman

Relationship Rescue by Phil McGraw

Divorce Busters by Michelle Weiner-Davis

His Needs, Her Needs by Dr. Willard F. Harley Jr

Getting the Love You Want, Harville Hendrix

If you are going to separate, there should be ground rules:

Should I stay or Go: How Controlled Separation Can Save Your Marriage, Lee Raffel and Jean Jouston

My best to you.


Carrie