Moving out but not breaking up

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2004
Moving out but not breaking up
2
Sun, 04-04-2004 - 8:57pm
Hi everyone. I have been with my girlfriend for 5 years (I am a 25 year old guy, she is 24) and we are both very unhappy with the state of our relationship. We both love each other very much but we also think of breaking up on a regular basis. We have tried many many things to make things work (therapy, self help books, promises to change, short term time away for eachother, ...). I recently decided that I need to move out in order to try to break the cycle that we have been living in. I could go on and on about why i made this decision, but I am really just curious to know a few things.

I was wondering if anyone knows of couples that have worked things out after moving into separate places, and then later moved back in together and been happy.

What are some things that are necessary to make this kind of.move work. (She does not want me to move out, but i need to for myself.)

I was also wondering what some of the benefits of making this kind of move could be.

Any input would be appreciated. I really, really don't want to lose my girlfriend.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Sun, 04-04-2004 - 9:01pm
Not sure this will help, as it talks about marriage and separations, but maybe:

Should I stay or Go: How Controlled Separation Can Save Your Marriage, Lee Raffel and Jean Jouston


Carrie

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2004
Sun, 04-04-2004 - 11:57pm
thanks, i got the book. it looks great. i hope she will think so as well.