:( Caught him cheeting last night
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| Sat, 07-10-2004 - 8:17am |
I have been dating this man off and on for 3 and a half years. Since Christmas its been becoming more and more of a boyfriend girlfriend thing. We are both AWFUL when it come to relationship issues. I was in a horrible marriage and divorced 4 years ago and have been very leery of relationships. He is a 45 year old bachelor/never married and also obviously has commitment issues. He is very close with all of his also mostly still single college buddies.
We are GOOD friends and have built what I thought was a sold relationship based on that.
As I said we have been "dating" for several months now but have had a relationship more or less for 3 1/2 years. I have two boys and have been spending every other weekend with him. He has also stayed at my home. We live in neighboring cities. Last weekend we did the 4th of July thing and he finally asked me over to his parents to meet his family and sister and her children.
About two months ago I had been out of town for a week in Vegas with my mother. He called me every day while I was gone to check in and seemed to miss me.
I had seen him the day I got back into town and though I would sneak out early the next morning and give him a wake up call if you know what I mean.
WELL I caught him with another woman. He of course says it was all a "fluke" and that he was sorry and didn't want to hurt me and so on and so on.
Took a couple weeks but I SO want to believe him and move forward.
Last night he called on his way home and we talked like we do most evenings. He asked what my plans were. (He know I have the boys this weekend) and he asked again so your just staying home tonight? I said yes and we talked and I went on with my evening.
I woke up early this morning thinking something isn't right. Well guess who's car is parked in his driveway.
I just don't get it ya know. And her car is a dump, she must be young as there is one of those flowery lays hanging from the mirror and crap all over the backseat and floor. I almost opened the door to go through her things.
He lives in a very nice neighborhood and is an established man. WHAT the hell is he doing, and why......why to me.
See know I am going to cry, why cant he just tell me he wants to move on and see other people. Good thing I never told him I loved him huh. The thing is, I have seen him do this before with his other girlfriends and for some reason thought that it was different this time.
:( I would miss him so much, but what does it say about his true feelings for me..... How can I live with myself if I try to rationalize this.

wow.... i am sooo sorry for this. but honey - you know who he is - you don't like what you see - you deserve better than this - you deserve a partner who will respect you - he doesn't.
and I know it will hurt, but YOU know, in your hearts of hearts, that this is NOT good.
hugs....
No body deserves to be cheated on. For any reason. That HO probably gave him mutiple STD's.
You know what else, I always say hi and wave to his neighbors as I arrive and stay all weekend. I am sure they have seen the different women. I am a joke and didnt even know it.
And I thought he was my best friend. See now I wonder how long this has been going on and if she is a regular or not, or who is.
The funny thing is that when I am there, there are no odd phone calls. He doesnt think twice about leaving me in his house alone.I leave my shampoo and conditioner in his shower. Wouldnt another woman pick up on womens things?
....he trusts me....he trusts that I am going to be the honest good girl and not snoop or stop by unexpecidley.
What must he really think of me?
Ok, done overthinking for now.
Part of me doesnt even want to tell him I know. Maybe just end it and save my diginity.
WHY? honey, repeat after me: "because he is a spineless, selfish, SOB".
that's why.
Sweetheart - really - DON'T waste your time and energy trying to figure HIM out.
yes, it hurts, but DO NOT spend ANY MORE of your time on this.
Destiny
Give him the boot and don't look back. This will allow you to be ready for the right person for you and your boys.
Bummer you have to go through this. But you do deserve more!!