i cheated, he forgave me...now what?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
i cheated, he forgave me...now what?
1
Tue, 07-20-2004 - 11:23am
Hi all, I'm pretty new here but needed some advice.

I have been dating a wonderful guy, John, on and off for about two and a half years now. Last fall he had an internship in Maryland, and before he left we had a big fight. After he left he basically ignored me, never called, never emailed, nothing. I assumed we were through and started dating someone else, Chris. Well, in December John came back and begged me to give him a second chance. I still loved him so much that I couldn't say no, but I also had developed feelings for this other guy and didn't have the heart to end it with him. So I dated both guys for awhile and was sleeping with Chris, mostly because I just wanted revenge on John. After a few months I realized that Chris wasn't what I wanted and dumped him to be with John.

Well, John recently found out about my relationship with Chris. He has agreed to give me another chance, but now I just don't know what to do or how to even act around him. Should I just be myself and pretend the whole thing never happened? Should I just give him some time and space? I'm so confused I don't know what to do. I love John with all my heart and never, ever want to hurt him again. Please help me with this. What makes matters worse is he is in Maryland now and I am in Michigan. He comes back in the middle of August. I just don't know where to begin rebuilding our relationship. Can anyone help me?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2003
Tue, 07-20-2004 - 1:15pm
You need to communicate with HIM. Ask him the questions you ask us. Tell him your fears, your concerns, your feelings. Ask him if he wants time and space. We can't tell you what he is thinking or how you should act around him and frankly if you have to 'act' a certain way then what do you have in this relationship?