not sure if it's me
Find a Conversation
not sure if it's me
| Tue, 08-07-2007 - 5:02pm |
this is my first time posting,
i've been in a relationship for a year now and have been talking about getting engaged. I have insecurity issues and have always been jealous of other women, mostly b/c of past bfs gone bad. so this has played a part in a lot of fights b/w me and my man. Things were great in the beginning, however now we've been fighting a lot. I'm started to have doubts. Most of our fights are b/c of my insecurites, I'll bring up other women, or how I don't like him going out w/the boys, which i know is silly, but i can't seem to bury that feeling. Also, sometimes he tells me he feels unattracted to me and he's not sure why. Our sex life is diminishing. It's not my looks or my body, b/c that hasn't changed at all, and he still thinks i'm beautiful, but it likely stems from my lack of confidence (after all, men find confidence sexy, who wants an insecure woman, right?) It's when i'm crying or emotionally needy that he finds himself unattracted to me. He thinks I need to find sources outside of him, like friends or activities to fulfill myself so I don't depend on him so much.
So the thing is, I'm having doubts about whether my relationship will last for marraige. We both love eachother more than anything, but my fear is that these issues are big and I won't be able to get past them. Any advice? Please help!
i've been in a relationship for a year now and have been talking about getting engaged. I have insecurity issues and have always been jealous of other women, mostly b/c of past bfs gone bad. so this has played a part in a lot of fights b/w me and my man. Things were great in the beginning, however now we've been fighting a lot. I'm started to have doubts. Most of our fights are b/c of my insecurites, I'll bring up other women, or how I don't like him going out w/the boys, which i know is silly, but i can't seem to bury that feeling. Also, sometimes he tells me he feels unattracted to me and he's not sure why. Our sex life is diminishing. It's not my looks or my body, b/c that hasn't changed at all, and he still thinks i'm beautiful, but it likely stems from my lack of confidence (after all, men find confidence sexy, who wants an insecure woman, right?) It's when i'm crying or emotionally needy that he finds himself unattracted to me. He thinks I need to find sources outside of him, like friends or activities to fulfill myself so I don't depend on him so much.
So the thing is, I'm having doubts about whether my relationship will last for marraige. We both love eachother more than anything, but my fear is that these issues are big and I won't be able to get past them. Any advice? Please help!

Welcome to the board ndugga01,
Seems that you already know what the issues are, so you have to make time to work on yourself.