Don't know where to go from here???

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2007
Don't know where to go from here???
2
Sun, 08-19-2007 - 3:36pm

Today my boyfriend of 3 years told me that he thinks we are at a stand still in our relationship and it's because he is not sure if we should be together or not. We have been living together for 2 years out of the 3 and it's been good. There have been rough times but that is to be expected....Last New Year's, we got into a really big fight around all our friends and his brother. After that night, he told me he wanted to move out. I was hurt and didn't want to see him leave but told him if that's what he wanted then to do it....he never did. Weve been much better since that time. Listening to eachother more, communication is better ect....but today he says he doesn't know again......I once again am hurt but don't want to be unhappy or him be unhappy. I told him if that's how he feels to go then. He said, he's not sure yet..
We had bought a bed together about 1 year ago so I just asked if I could have the bed. All he said was, "ohh so that's what were doing, I'm moving out." I'm confused. I thought that is just what he said or said without saying.

I kinda feel like him moving out will make him see how good we are for eachother but then again I don't want him to go out and hook up with others. I also don't want to wait around for the rest of my life for him to make a decision. We are both 28 years old and not getting younger. But, weve also put so much time in to eachother to throw it away, but I feel it would help...Not sure what to do or say to him....any help..

So my ex and I dated for 3 years lived together for 2. We have been broken up for 1.5 years. It was a mutual brk up. I moved 2 hours away about a year ago and often go back home and visit. We did keep in touch for the first year then

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Mon, 08-20-2007 - 12:30pm

Welcome to the board case84,


You might find these interesting:


Zen of Doing Nothing

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
Mon, 08-20-2007 - 12:48pm

Welcome to the board case84,


Would your bf be willing to go to couples counseling with you to figure this out?


I know how confusing and hard this can be. My ex used to always talk about wanting to move out, etc, etc. In the end, I was the one who made the decision to end the relationship.


Sit down with him and ask him what it is that he really wants and what he is confused about. Maybe the two of you can come up with some way to work through his issues.

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket