ATTACHED AND DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2007
ATTACHED AND DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO
3
Mon, 08-27-2007 - 11:14am
I started seeing this guy a few weeks ago.He's about 8 years older than me and has a kid.Which wasn't a problem for me since I consider myself to be mature enough.Well,the child's mother left "Jake" with the child about 6 months ago.She's real bad on drugs and has 5 other children as well but they're not Jake's.Basically the "white trash type".She hasnt tried to contact Jake's child or have anything to do with him since she has left.So over the past 3 weeks, I haven't really assumed the role as mommy or anything but me and the child have gotten close and so has Jake and me.
Just this past weekend,Jake let me take the child on my own to spend some time with him which I thought was a good sign because it showed me that he trusted me with the child.After I dropped off the child at Jake's house, I wanted to go home and he asked me what I was doing later the night.I told him nothing,so we had planned to go to the movies after he got back from his sister's house.
Well,around 7 or so he had called and left me a message saying that his child dropped his phone in the toilet and that it was messing up a bit but he would call me later the night but he didnt.Then the next day I called him around 9 in the morning and no answer.Then around 10:30 he sent me a text message saying that his phone was messed up and that his ex was there trying to start trouble and that he would call me later.No calls, so i decided to call him around 3:30.He answered and said that his ex was starting all sorts of trouble and trying to get the rest of her stuff and that he would call me in a while.
Around 5 I called him to see if he would like me to the child the next day to get the child's mind off everything but there was no answer.He didnt call me back and he still hasn't called me.So I dont know if I should call him or wait it out or what.I'm kind of curious as in what is going on.I understand that there is tension on him right now but I still think he should've called me and let me know if everything is ok.What does everyone think? Thanks!
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Mon, 08-27-2007 - 12:40pm

Welcome to the boarfd tattoogal,


Stop calling.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
Mon, 08-27-2007 - 12:55pm
I say send him a text telling him you were just wondering how everything was okay and you know he is stressed so I just call when he can. Then don't call or text, wait for him to contact you after that.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Mon, 08-27-2007 - 3:09pm

What kind of father gives his child to his girlfriend of a few weeks so they can spend time together? Seriously, who does that??

Sounds like this guy has got a lot on his hands right now and simply isn't thinking straight. He's got too much going on in his life to have a relationship, if that's what you're after then you're going to assume a lot of his life baggage as well. I wouldn't get in any deeper, personally.