A little advice please

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-17-2008
A little advice please
5
Sun, 02-17-2008 - 5:04am

I posted to "should I go should I stay", I need all the advice I can get...


I am 31 years old, I have 2 children and I have been in a relationship with my guy now for almost 5 years...


My situation is that he is a sex addict, he is always cheating on me... there has been several different women in a month... this past year alone I can not tell you how many women he has slept with... he tells me that he loves me and only me, that he doesn't care for these women that he "kicks" it with and that he takes care of me... he thinks that he is a good person and that I shouldn't leave him because he provides for me and my children... but I am emotionally and physically tired... in the early years I use to tell myself that I could deal with it you know that I could handle it... my youngest child is his so I said I was staying for my children's purpose, but right now it is almost 4:00am and he is still not home... I don't know what or how to do... I can not afford to live on my own, I don't want to go to a shelter and I don't have any family that I can turn to... a little advice please!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Sun, 02-17-2008 - 9:09am

Do you think it's best for your children to stay with someone who treats you horribly?
Do you have a daughter you'd like to see grow up to find a man like this?
If you do the best thing for yourself, you're doing the right thing by your kids.
Right now you are hurting yourself by staying and therefore hurting your children as well.

You have to go. Do you have a job?

Is this guy the father of your kids? If so he owes you child support regardless of who he's sleeping with.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2008
Sun, 02-17-2008 - 9:51am

I agree with Egg... completely!


Sexual addiction is a self destructive behavior.

Perky007

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2007
Sun, 02-17-2008 - 11:10am
So basically he gets to have sex as much as he wants with free childcare?
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-17-2008
Sun, 02-17-2008 - 11:43am
Why is the right thing to do so hard to do... I should know better, my exhusband was worst... and I lived in woman's shelters for about 2 years before I got back on my feet, and then I met my guy... and now I am sitting here very frustrated, why can't he go... but he won't... and believe me my family calls me for help... I was apartment hunting, but it is like so overwhelming, starting over and over and over again... God give me strength, how can I have been so stupid...
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Mon, 02-18-2008 - 3:24pm

Welcome to the board mothershine,


You aren't stupid. You were/are in love.