Trust Issues

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2008
Trust Issues
3
Wed, 02-20-2008 - 12:50pm

I have been with my girlfriend now for about 8 months. I really love her to bits, but we have this issue in our relationship, trust.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
Wed, 02-20-2008 - 12:57pm

Welcome to the board justanormalguy,


It is great that you want to help her, but this is her issue and it is going to be up to her to fix it. It is ridiculous that she would ask you to look at the floor when another woman walks by. I would tell her that you really want this relationship to work, but that her jealousy issues are getting in the why and you think she should consider getting some counseling to help her work through it. Or go by her some self help book regarding jealousy.


Best of luck to you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Wed, 02-20-2008 - 1:03pm

Welcome to the board justanormalguy,


She's got issues that you can't fix, change or heal.

Avatar for drshoshanna
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-20-2008 - 5:39pm

Actually, if she is carrying around baggage from other relationships and hasn't been able to get over the shock of being cheated on, she is the one who needs to see a therapist and work her trust issues out. You can't do it for her. These issues are inside her, and no matter what you do, they will come up. That said, of course, sending letters like that are not just a joke. You can easily see how they could cause her to feel this is happening again. Looking down at the floor is too much, but you can reassure her, not flirt with others, let her know you care for her. And beyond that, truly it is up to her to deal with the issue. Let her know you want to be with her forever, and that she needs to work these feelings through, or else they could disrupt the relationship.


Best wishes,