his X still lives with him

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-21-2008
his X still lives with him
10
Thu, 02-21-2008 - 6:05pm
I've been dating this guy for almost 3 years.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Thu, 02-21-2008 - 7:57pm

I agree with your ultimatum, and I don't normally agree with ultimatums. But it's really inappropriate for him to be carrying on in a serious relationship when he is still living with his ex.

If they can't separate by march 31st, then it will be for the best that you break up.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Thu, 02-21-2008 - 8:20pm

Welcome to the board pirategal,


3 years, I'm surprised you've lasted this long.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-21-2008
Thu, 02-21-2008 - 9:37pm
Thank you so much for your replies. It means a lot. I feel awkward asking him to get her out of his life completely, but I would really like that. It would give me such piece of mind. Do you think its appropriate and reasonable to ask?
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Fri, 02-22-2008 - 7:14am
You have the right to ask for anything you want. Do I think it's reasonable for you to ask him to cut all contact with his roommate forever? Not if you've been tolerating it for three years, I don't think so. Living with her is one thing, but what does she do to threaten your relationship?
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2005
Fri, 02-22-2008 - 7:52am
that must be really hard for you...I think an important issue is how long were they broken up when you got together? and do you get along with her? If she really isn't posing any threat and they are just friends, I don't think it would be fair for you to ask him to cut her out of his life completely. However, he should understand how hard this is for you and be willing to change the situation. a lot of people wouldn't be willing to put up with that situation. Good luck, I hope everything works out for you
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-21-2008
Fri, 02-22-2008 - 9:29am

She and I don't get along. When we first started dating and spending the night together she would call in the middle of the night. That only lasted about a week, I'm pretty sure he said something to her about it. When she and I are in the same room as him she is nice to me, but when he isn't there she ignores me. She has even done the "accidental" shoulder bump while walking by (no we aren't in junior high). I've said hi to her couple times with him not in the room and she just ignores me. A guy that is friends with her and I told me that he thinks she still likes my boyfriend because of how she talks about him. I don't think she knows I'm friends with that boy too. I don't like going to his apartment often so I don't see her often.


I used to live with a boy that was just a friend. When he would bring girls home,

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2003
Fri, 02-22-2008 - 10:41am

His ex still lives with him?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Fri, 02-22-2008 - 11:41am
Considering the evidence I'm most inclined to agree with oldnimrod's advice.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Fri, 02-22-2008 - 12:45pm

::When she and I are in the same room as him she is nice to me, but when he isn't there she ignores me. She has even done the "accidental" shoulder bump while walking by (no we aren't in junior high). I've said hi to her couple times with him not in the room and she just ignores me. A guy that is friends with her and I told me that he thinks she still likes my boyfriend because of how she talks about him.


After 3 years, it would seem she would want him to be happy in a new relationship and at least make an attempt to make you feel comfortable.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-21-2008
Fri, 02-22-2008 - 8:56pm
I