Is my Husband Gay

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-2008
Is my Husband Gay
7
Wed, 12-03-2008 - 8:19pm

I just wanted anyone out there to give me their opinion on what they think.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2004
In reply to: rgs33
Wed, 12-03-2008 - 10:57pm

Since your husband has admitted to several encounters with men, you should make sure you protect yourself in case he has picked up any diseases.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-30-2008
In reply to: rgs33
Wed, 12-03-2008 - 11:38pm

If he is no longer attracted to men or having those experiences...then I wouldnt consider him to be gay.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
In reply to: rgs33
Thu, 12-04-2008 - 8:35am
rgs, I don't mean any disrespect but you don't have the right to label your husband's sexuality, only he does. Sexuality is such a grey area and it can change over time. I believe that at one point he experimented with men in order to relieve curiosity and now he wants to put that part of him behind him and move forward as a straight married man. If he defines himself now as "straight" and is exclusive to you as a woman then he is straight regardless of what he's done in the past. Some people need to try out different things in order to be able to define themselves better one way or the other.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-2008
In reply to: rgs33
Thu, 12-04-2008 - 9:29am
I don't mean to be disrepectful about this, but first off thank you for responding.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
In reply to: rgs33
Thu, 12-04-2008 - 5:06pm

Welcome to the board rgs33,


I think you made the right decision for you and your children.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
In reply to: rgs33
Thu, 12-04-2008 - 6:39pm
I didn't know he gave you an STD... that was horrible of him to do to you regardless of his sexuality. I agree you're probably best off divorcing him, I can't blame you because I don't think I would be able to live with someone who did that to me. I hope you find a happier life.
Avatar for drshoshanna
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: rgs33
Fri, 12-05-2008 - 9:50am

Well clearly there are sexual issues here. And you also say he has a sexual addiction. It's probably a good idea for both of you to get to a marriage counselor to explore what's really going on. Whatever he does or doesn't say about it, he is presently involved in bi-sexual activity. It wasn't a one time thing.So, yes, he needs to face what's going on and deal with what is needed of him to be in a monogomous marriage.


Best wishes,