So insecure I can barely be alone

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-27-2007
So insecure I can barely be alone
8
Sun, 12-07-2008 - 4:36pm

I am having issues with my husband being very insecure and possessive and is EXTREMELY critical of me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2007
Sun, 12-07-2008 - 8:07pm

Wow. What a horrible life you are leading.

I completely second your idea of leaving him. However, I'm concerned that when you do, he may turn into crazy stalker guy. When you leave, be very careful. Perhaps other posters may have some advice on dealing with nutty ex husbands.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2004
Sun, 12-07-2008 - 8:40pm
The issue of nutty exhusbands is addressed on the Domestic Abuse board: http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-rldomesting. I agree that you are being abused, and need to get out to preserve your sanity.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2008
Sun, 12-07-2008 - 11:20pm
I agree with the other posters - get out of that marriage.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-30-2008
Mon, 12-08-2008 - 12:05pm

Either divorce or get counseling.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Mon, 12-08-2008 - 4:17pm

Welcome to the board abstract_artist,


Is counseling an option, for you alone to sort through and make a decision?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-27-2007
Mon, 12-08-2008 - 6:14pm

Thank you for your support. In answer to your question about if he was like this before the marriage, I think he did a really good job at hiding it and "pretending" that he was this easy-going, fun loving guy.....because literally right after we married, this started getting really bad. Once he had me "right where he wanted me" so to speak, he started showing his true colors, I guess.


Keep me in your thoughts!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
Mon, 12-08-2008 - 7:04pm
I am so so sorry... I wouldn't even recommend counseling if this is even close to as bad as it sounds. You really should end it and just move on. My prayers are with you, you seem very strong to be holding up all of this craziness in your life and I'm sure you'll get through it
Avatar for drshoshanna
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 12-09-2008 - 6:43pm

Yes, indeed, it is emotional abuse. You are with a severely disturbed man who is stalking you emotionally and also has lied to you, vis a vis children and is clearly trying to dominate, possess and dismantle you. If you stay in a situation like this, you could really be in emotional trouble.


You need guidance, support, and clarity now in making healthy choices. Get yourself to a really fine therapist who will be there for you as you work your way out of this situation. It could be tricky on many levels, so you need to do this with the support of people who are trained to help you through it.


Best wishes,