Are you as nice to yourself as you are to others?
Oh, Musher!! Me too!!!
It is such a difficult pattern to know how to interrupt. Maybe we can work on it together. Share what we're up to and let the other advise if it is more of the care taking. I am thinking that is what I am doing here at my niece's place. It is basically for 6 months unless I decide to find my own place here when her man gets back. It is a necessary step financially.. totally broke... but am I trying to fix her??. Is this a good thing or a negative.?? Should I be letting her figure it out for herself?? Probably. I just see myself as providing some initial guidance here and there when the opening offers itself so that she can find the path. But will she with me here? And, is that my place?? She lost her mother when she was 11 and has had no parents to guide her.
Before I came here, I kept hearing from family I should do whatever brings me happiness. But how can you do that when you are on a limited income and broke, both financially and emotionally?
(They are on the East Coast I was on the West.) I think maybe I am so vulnerable that they (family) don't want to take the chance of doing more damage than good. Will I ever have a life?? Seems not.
Will I ever have a life??Seems not.
You must get these negative thoughts out of your mind.Please try hard to do so. I think Poppy would agree with me on this one,you are telling the universe I am broke my life is a mess,I am emotionally empty and that is what you are attracting back to yourself over and over again.Pray and send positive thoughts out,say my life will change for the better b/c I am a good person,and I deserve to be happy.
Oh, musher, I do or I think I do.. the best I know how. But you stumble and it all comes bubbling up out of the ground saying "remember me... I'm still here!!". It is hard to be strong when there is negativity around you, I guess.
You see I think I need to learn to turn my back when rl people pour out their stuff.. to turn it off; cut it off at the get-go. Yes, I think that is what I must do. Not be the proverbial shoulder and care taker. I realized that finally a week or so ago; saw where I was going wrong but I slipped. Thank you so much for the life lesson. I may have to keep relearning it until it sticks but I think you have straightened me from my misstep and I am back on the path again. Hugs to you!! (((((((((musher50))))))))))))
I'm so sorry you're lonely.
It's a privilege to know you. I love your posts, they're always inspirational. You are a worthy addition to this group. ___________________________________________________________________
Oh, Ludam!! Thank you. Talk about tears welling up!!! Your caring and thoughtful response meant so much. I will save this and read it daily.
''I cant believe i'm saying all these things here.
You are a beautiful person and one day I want for you to know it just as those around you know it already.
Perfection does not make beauty, imperfection
cl-ivhjudeLiving with CancerCancer: Friends & Family SupportFinding Your Best Life
It's difficult to say no. I had to learn to say no, and one year I would push myself to answer "No!" to every question instead of automatically say yes. Not that I would refuse, but to just be able to say the word 'no'. I am much better at it now, but I learned it the hard way, too...
Now I make sure that I do something nice for me. I also make sure that people are not taking advantage of me before I say 'yes', which is something that sometimes my nephew doesn't appreciate rofl!
Yeah, I know. I do that too. I do it less frequently now, but sometimes I find myself muttering "If you only knew the truth" under my breath or I quickly change the subject.
I think you are ready to step out of your comfort zone. Whilst this board is a safe place, it's still a new place but you were ready for it. When I read your posts I see someone who has all her building blocks in front of her, and who is deciding what still works and what doesn't, and who is slowly getting rid of the things that aren't relevant anymore whilst looking for new ideas. It's an arduous task! I am honoured that you have chosen to share with us, Ludam.