Man Puzzle..Need Advice!
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Man Puzzle..Need Advice!
| Mon, 08-08-2005 - 11:07pm |
Perhaps someone can figure this man out because I certainly can't! Him and I were friends for 3 years before we decided to actually date this past May. Before I always told him I wasn't ready for a relationship and I eventually gave in and gave him a chance and he seemed like a decent guy. We went out on a couple of dates and ended up fooling around on the last one. Since then I haven't seen him but we talk online sometimes, about everyday or every other day. But when we do talk it's very short and it's about what HE wants to talk about. I brought up the situation with us but suddenly he doesn't want to make it official and refuses to talk about it. He's been playing mind games about what he wants. One minute he says he needs me, then the next he acts like nothing has happened between us. Before we started "dating" he was the complete opposite; he was sweet--sending me love songs and pretty much just doing all the right things that a woman expects/hopes for. Now he's done a 360 and isn't like that. I figured it's him being a typical male and him just stopping once they think they have you. I tried bringing up "us" but all he says is "let's take it slow" or he will just refuse to talk about it all together. He tries to come across as Mr.Nice Guy and all innocent when I know that isn't the case. The last time I saw him he tried to get me into bed with him and then the next day apologized for his actions. Long story short--he's invited me over several times and then a minute later says nevermind. He claims we're just friends yet calls me up wanting to mess around when he claims he's not into that(riiiiight). I can't figure him out. We don't hang out as friends anymore or at all for that matter, and he only seems to want to see me when he's in the mood for something. I'm about 99% sure there isn't another woman. But since we're not hanging out anymore or talking like we used to, why is he still keeping the communication line open? I figured he'd be like most guys and back off but this one isn't so it leaves me up in the air about what he wants from me (if anything). So can anyone figure this guy out? Does he want a relationship with me like he used to say he did, or is it all a game? Should I just forget all about this guy or am I missing something?

Define "friends" for me.
Marie,
>We don't hang out as friends anymore or at all
>for that matter, and he only seems to want to
>see me when he's in the mood for something
Most men in this situation would be worried about ruining a good friendship when contemplating the transition to lover. I actually think men and women are identical in this respect. But he doesn’t seem bothered either way and this makes me think it was more about sex than anything else.
>Should I just forget all about this guy
>or am I missing something?
No! You are NOT missing anything. You have been forthright with your feelings and he isn't interested. He is playing games and trying to manipulate you. He is *NOT* a nice guy.