Some days can sure drain ya! :(

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-03-2005
Some days can sure drain ya! :(
4
Sun, 08-28-2005 - 6:41pm

I ran into an OLD girlfriend's mom today. This girl was my best friend back in High School, senior year and alittle beyond. Then things fell apart and we lost touch - I've heard tidbits here and there about her - about 4 years ago she got married, married a military man and moved to Georgia or something. But today when I heard about her... it kinda hurt.

She's living in SOUTH KOREA!!!! and just had her first baby last Tuesday. A boy! So she is over there in a STRANGE country with just her husband and just having had a baby and I thought :( that is kinda sad! And yet, I couldn't help but be alittle bit envious! Of what? well... she's off living her life and moving on... and her mom asked me a couple questions like where I was living and what I was doing (work-wise) - I gave VERY vague answers and when she asked if I was married I did the typical... "noooooooooo" like I was avoiding it - when really the answer is... it hasn't presented it's self in a pretty little package like I'm waiting for! :( It's like I didn't want the mom to go back to the old friend and be like "nope, nothing's changed there... still single, on her own and working in the same field" (I didn't finish college so it's not like I choose my field!)

How amazing to be in SOUTH KOREA! I mean - I'm sure it's not a vacation but... to be able to say you've lived there. And now she's had a baby... she's kinda one of my LAST friends/exfriends that I was waiting to hear that about. And overall my thought pattern was... what is it about ME that hasn't progressed to THAT point? Am I the lone freak that hasn't been able to grasp the world by its balls and move past this point of my life!? This independent, somewhat self-centered lifestyle!

Then again - I might be overreacting! :p

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Sun, 08-28-2005 - 6:54pm

My best friend and I regularly do a roll-call of people in my graduating class and where they are in life.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Mon, 08-29-2005 - 11:54am
I'm with you ladies! I've been out of high school for 9 years and I still don't have a college degree, I'm not married, no kids, I don't own a house, I don't have an exciting career. It makes me feel embarrassed sometimes. But then when I think of some of the things I've been through and what my life COULD be like right now (as in, if I'd let certain things ruin my life and send me down a bad path), I don't feel so bad. KWIM?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2005
Mon, 08-29-2005 - 12:25pm
I know what you mean. It’s not difficult to compare our lives with people we perceive as successful and wonder where we went wrong. I do it too. But it is important to remember that we are all different and as a result our timelines are also different. Some people might achieve all their success in their early 20’s whilst others will take longer. I read somewhere that success should be measured not by what you have achieved, but instead, by comparing what you have achieved with what you could have achieved. On a Side Note, I think about what happened to Christopher Reeve and wonder if he would have given up all of his fame and fortune just to be able to do what I took for granted each day.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Mon, 08-29-2005 - 12:48pm

Great point, hal. I agree with you 100%. There's a girl I've been reading about who was the victim of a serious car accident a few years ago and as a result, she was severely burned and disfigured. I look at that poor girl and think, "How can I feel sorry for myself when this poor thing has gone through that?"

And I tell myself that about the timeline, too. I worry a lot because I'm having money problems right now, whereas people my age (and younger!) are getting married and buying houses. But lots of people have money problems - some have them young like me, others have them when they're older. So just because things are tough for me now doesn't mean I can't turn it around and have that house someday. It's just going to happen at a different time for me.

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