Where do we stand?
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Where do we stand?
| Sun, 09-04-2005 - 2:50am |
I met this really great guy, and we went on a very casual first date the other night. Then, the next day he asked if he could see me again...that night. I said yes and we went out again, and had a great time. Anyways, we've gone on 4 dates and each one is better & more comfortable. When we're cuddling and being quiet, he tells me he really really likes me, and says he's "so comfortable" with me. We can sit there and just look into each other's eyes, and it's a wonderful feeling. I already feel rather strongly about him, but I am so afraid to even bring up the whole "where do we stand?" question. I am worried he's not as into me, as I am him...even though he has been the one making the initiative to ask me out again. Am I paranoid, or do you think he is pretty into me? (The last 2 guys I've gotten involved with completely ditched me and never talked to me again, so...I am pretty cautious). I want to know if he is thinking about dating exclusively (or if we already are), and what he thinks of me as. How can I bring this up, without making him think I'm trying to push him to get really serious?

I wouldn't bring it up yet.
I think it's way too soon to ask where you stand with him. However, it's not too soon to ask what type of relationship he's looking for IN GENERAL, not with you (and be sure to phrase it in such a way that the distinction is clear), to make sure you are on the same page.
As for exclusivity, I don't talk about that until we are on the verge of sleeping together. I'm not comfortable sleeping with someone until we've specifically discussed it and agreed to date exclusively. But until that time, I assume in the absence of any specific agreement to the contrary that we are each free to date other people, and that the other person is doing so.
Sheri