Need Help Desperately

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-10-2005
Need Help Desperately
3
Sat, 09-10-2005 - 3:17pm

Hello. I am a 34 year old divorced mother of two. My ex has had the children and has just recently had both legs amputated. I have had the children for the last month. I had thought I had found my soul mate a year ago. We started dating and he got scared and backed off. Then he had a friend that was getting a divorce so he let her and her 3 kids move in with him and his two kids. He stayed in touch with me the entire time. Around October of last year, he moved her out and we started seeing each other. Things were going really great. I was staying over there every night except for the times I had my kids. I started going to school, and he was very supportive of me through that. He paid a ticket that I got and ended up costing him $700. He also got me a tattoo that cost $150. And he paid a hot check that I didn't know about that cost $161.00. So, he has done alot for me.
But I have been out of school since July and I haven't found a job yet. I have been looking pretty hard but he is pulling away from me, and he said he doesn't know if he still loves me or not. What can I do?

Lora

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Sun, 09-11-2005 - 4:00pm

You can't make a person love you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-10-2005
Mon, 09-12-2005 - 11:18am
Thank you for your response. I know that you are right. He just keeps sending me mixed signals. Like he was gone to Amarillo this weekend. Before he left, he said he couldn't say if he still loved me or not. But then he brings me back a shirt from the Harley shop and calls when he gets home. What am I supposed to think?
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2005
Mon, 09-12-2005 - 11:49am
<> In short, nothing.
Tell him you appreciate everything he's done for you but if he doesn't know if he loves you then you can't continue to give your heart to him. You hear a lot about "deal breakers" around here and I think one of the most obvious is someone not knowing if they love you or not.
You're worth more than that. You're worth someone who's certain they love you and want to be with you. Stand on your own two feet, respect yourself and move on.