I must smell

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
I must smell
10
Mon, 12-05-2005 - 7:55am

I don't get it.

I went speed dating today. In general I had a good time and had good conversations with 80% of the guys. But it wasn't that that bothers me... ok here it goes:

The ladies were asked to sit and the guys followed. We were short of one guy cos one didn't show... so out of the 10 ladies I was the one without a date for the first round. That's fine... then- right at the end, after all the rounds, I was the one without a date AGAIN... some of the guys were moving around, going to the toilet and stuff but no one came to sit next to me... there was this one guy who chose to sit opposite me (but next to another girl)... so the 3 of us just chatted away. That's all fine... maybe I'm just not any of their type... but I can't help wondering if I smell or something?!

I know I'm not unattractive- I've been told so... I'm not overweight and I have normal nose, eyes, mouth, ears, hair... I don't get it... I can even show you a pic of me!

I don't get it... I give up on guys... from my experience, either I meet someone and he's totally wrong for me but there's so much chemistry... or I meet guys, no chemistry and they run!

grrr.... Men are stupid

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-27-2005
In reply to: red_mushroom
Mon, 12-05-2005 - 10:34am
well I can tell you right now..men are not just stupid,maybe the ones you are meetign gave you a chance and well didn`t like what they saw or felt you were right and that is it,that is life!Men like sexy dressed women..they like flirting..many women flirt,and believe me if a guy KNOWS he will get laid if he goes out for couple drinks that night with a woman,he will pursue it all he can..the women are not as easy..will ahve more difficult time..nothing wrong with that,but men are men
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2005
In reply to: red_mushroom
Mon, 12-05-2005 - 10:52am

>well I can tell you right now..men are not just stupid

I think (hope) what you meant to write is "it's not just men that are stupid"...there is a big difference.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-27-2005
In reply to: red_mushroom
Mon, 12-05-2005 - 10:56am
whatever....it is a message board we don`t have to be so perfect...anyways if a guy does not like you,then he does not like you...it does not mean he is a jerk...if you don`t like a guy,does that make you a b*tch?nope.
Men are more after sex than relationships also...If he senses a woman is hard to get in bed with,he may lose interest real quick.But to go on that all men are jerks,is not really fair
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2005
In reply to: red_mushroom
Mon, 12-05-2005 - 11:12am

>whatever....it is a message board we don`t have to be so perfect...

WHAT!? I am a man. If another man is trying to convince a message board full of women that men are NOT stupid I would expect nothing less than perfection.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
In reply to: red_mushroom
Mon, 12-05-2005 - 3:18pm

Man... I think I'm just always remember that guy I met through a friend last year... wow it was like at first sight on both sides:) and so much chemistry... unfortunately he lived in another city and was still a student and I was already working full time. I didn't even get to find out how old he was and to top it off, he applied to study in my city, got a place, emailed me and said he's coming except at the same time I got back together with my ex!!!

Talk about unlucky in love.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-27-2004
In reply to: red_mushroom
Mon, 12-05-2005 - 7:07pm
Not all men are mainly interested in sex over r'ships just because you are. You are making a generalization here. There are men out there who do want to share their lives with someone special and are not looking for the sexy-dressed flirts, but women who are real, who they can have an intelligent conversation with and who they see themselves with long-term. To the OP, dating is tough, it's all about meeting the right person at the right time and having 2 parties that are at similar points in their lives looking for the same sorts of things. For me finding the one has been like searching for the holy grail, don't give up hope. I guess it's because I'm picky but we all should be since this is the person we'll hopefully be spending the rest of our lives with. He is out there it's just a matter of when you'll run into him. I'm trying to keep my hope of finding him up as much as I can.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-27-2005
In reply to: red_mushroom
Mon, 12-05-2005 - 7:34pm
yes men like to have girlfriends but they do not want to wait 10 dates to have sex either.And If a man still isn`t interested in it after a few dates then I don`t think he is interested in me.But this is just me.Relationships take time...sex is just sex.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-27-2004
In reply to: red_mushroom
Tue, 12-06-2005 - 12:27am
SOME men will not wait 10 dates to have sex with a woman but if a man is really into a woman and sees a future with her then he will wait 10 dates or longer if it was important to her. The men I've had r'ships with have all waited longer (some a lot longer) than 10 dates because they knew it was important to me to hold off on sex and it should be comfortable for both people not just one. If a man did not respect my wishes to wait for sex because of me being uncomfortable then I would have no problem moving on to the next one. No big loss to me.
Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
In reply to: red_mushroom
Tue, 12-06-2005 - 7:41am

Exactly.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-27-2005
In reply to: red_mushroom
Tue, 12-06-2005 - 8:48am
that is fine...just don`t tease a guy...going out for drinks or being alone with him is not smart...i have a friend who has invited guys back to her place..not good!As for men..maybe some are decent to wait..but who is to say they are not getting it elsewhere? alot of women on boards say most guys will wait..but in reality many are not respectful enough to wait..and i am very straight and say it like it is...to say most guys will lwait.not realistic to me..women who are waiting until they get married,should not get mad when they get dumped all the time and call men are jerks...some people flip out over anything I say in the board and shouldn`t read waht I write if you are going to be so angry...but to say many men wil wait and are not just out for sex..sorry but let`s be real