Poll type question: how many...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Poll type question: how many...
6
Mon, 01-23-2006 - 2:54pm
really compatible love relationships have you had? (Not ones where just you've been infatuated or he's been infatuated, but where you honestly got along with the person better than anyone else and considered them your best friend as well as your lover. Where they shared your life values and treated you well. Where you respected, admired and really liked them and vice versa.) How old are you now? How did the relationship(s) end? Just curious to hear people's stories....
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2003
Mon, 01-23-2006 - 3:03pm

I've only been in one serious relationship in my life and that was with my ex. We were together for 8 years, from the ages of 18-26. We shared everything and at one time wanted to get married. He treated me like a queen, spoiled me even and he was my best friend at that time. I was very happy and felt like the luckiest girl in the world with him.

I am just 3 weeks shy of my 28th birthday and haven't been in a relationship since (though I've dated ad nauseum). We broke up because he fell out of love with me and married the very next girl he met. We have not spoken since the breakup and it was extremely hard for me to move on. In fact, he was in my dream just last night.

I hope I can experience a love like that again...one day.

(deep sigh)

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2005
Mon, 01-23-2006 - 3:04pm

I'm 45, and in my lifetime I've had 4 true relationships. The first was when I was 26 and it lasted 3 years -- and ended cause he was not ready for marriage. The second was when I was about 29 and that lasted 1-1/2 years and I didn't want to marry him -- too traditional. The third was when I was 34, and lasted 3 years and ended in divorce and birth of my son (married less than 6 mos); and my last relationship was at 41 and lasted 1-1/2 years and he was not ready for marriage.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Mon, 01-23-2006 - 3:34pm

One. I met him at 24 and we were together until we were both 29. (I'm now 30 - 31 in a few months).

We broke up because he was scared to death to commit. Wouldn't even move in with me, let alone get married.

AJ, enjoying life with C.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-20-2006
Mon, 01-23-2006 - 4:56pm

I guess I don't understand this question, if we'd truly been in the kind of relationship you write about - would we be on a "single life" board?

My last relationship was over years long. Fabulous relationship as far as a friendship goes but because we didn't have some of the other factors that one needs to build a life together, it's over. So, I'd say that doesn't fit into what you are asking!? I also had a brief affair where I was totally in love with the man, he cared for me but it could never be so it ended, I wouldn't say that relationship had all the makings of what you are talking about either. So!?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Mon, 01-23-2006 - 7:28pm

My current relationship. Without any of those things you listed, there's no way we could do the distance. We're both 24. And still going strong.

Rubyshoes

Photobucket


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2005
Mon, 01-23-2006 - 9:23pm

I have had one such relationship so far. He felt like my best friend, it felt like I'd known him forever, he loved me like I was, and I loved him. The catch? I never physically fancied him. I was 19 when I met him and really liked him, but never found him attractive. He is not ugly at all, he just didn't "do" anything for me. BUT I thought the physical side was much overrated, hence we started to date. After 5 and a half years together I admitted to myself that I had been wrong, and that attraction to your bf *is* important.

I am 28 now. I had a fling since we broke up, but it was mostly infatuation (I thought it was love, but looking back it wasn't really) and we broke up a few months ago.

I really do hope to experience another relationship like the one I described in the first paragraph, but with the addition of physical atttraction. If I meet someone like that, I hope to marry him :-)

Edited 1/23/2006 9:26 pm ET by goddess_bikingmad




Edited 1/23/2006 9:26 pm ET by goddess_bikingmad