I'm such an overanalyzer

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2003
I'm such an overanalyzer
1
Tue, 09-05-2006 - 10:14pm

Hey all,

So, I’m fairly new to the dating game (I ended a six-year relationship last May and have just started dating again) and I think I may be having trouble reading signals or figuring out what the rules are. Any advice on what to do in the following situation would be great.

About 3 weeks ago I went on a trip to Vegas with a gf of mine. The first night, she went to bed early, and I was starving so I went to the café to get something to eat. While eating at the bar, I met the guy next to me, and we ended up chatting/hanging out till about 4 in the morning. We exchanged numbers, but that was it. The next day, we texted throughout the day and then ended up hanging out again that night. Everything was super comfortable, and as he put it “it felt like we knew each other for a long time.” For the most part, we just chatted and enjoyed each other’s company, but it was Vegas, so there was some fooling around between the two of us, but no sex. We went to lunch together the next day, and then it was time for me to drive home.

It turns out that both of us live in the same city (I had been traveling for work for awhile). When I got back to our city, I texted him to let him know I was back and if he wanted to hang out some tome. Unfortunately, both of us had conflicting work schedules for the next two weeks, but we texted each other quite often throughout that time (every to every other day), until last Thursday we realized we were both in the city and he called (the first time we spoke on the phone!) so we could try to schedule to meet up for a drink. It didn’t work out that night, but the next day he called again and said he felt badly that we didn’t get to meet and that he had a free hour before he was supposed to go to dinner with friends and did I want to meet for a drink? I had just got back from the gym, but I scrambled to put myself together and meet him.

That hour was just ok. Things were sometimes awkward, sometimes normal, but given the fact that we were both rushed, and hadn’t seen each other since that one event, I feel like we should actually go out for some time and give it a shot. Anyhow, the hour ended with a hug, and I texted him later to give him the name and address of a restaurant I had mentioned that was near his apt. I also said I was going out that night and to text me if he was out late. That was Friday.

It’s Tuesday now, I haven’t heard from him, and I’m beginning to wonder if I will. I’m sure I’m overanalyzing, but we had both texted so often before that the silence seems deafening. I was thinking of calling him either tomorrow or Thursday to see if he wanted to go out to dinner this weekend, but I don’t want to seem pushy. Though he did mention at one pt on Friday that the men shouldn’t have to do all the work.

I really don’t know what to do. Am I just overanalyzing or did I blow it on Friday when things were awkward?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-18-2006
Wed, 09-06-2006 - 9:24am
Hi there
I tend to over analyze too! Maybe since last weekend was a holiday weekend he got busy with other stuff and hasn't got around to contacting you. Hopefully you'll hear something today :-)