Hmmm....

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2005
Hmmm....
10
Sat, 10-21-2006 - 10:53am

This is kind of a

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Sat, 10-21-2006 - 1:50pm

I think that any time we get lots of compliments on our looks, we feel more confident.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Mon, 10-23-2006 - 12:29pm

>>When you blend in- ie are average- you really just don't get as much attention, no matter how confident you are.<<

I disagree. I know 'average' looking people who just seem to sparkle. It may not even be confidence -- it's happiness or contentment or something. I truly believe there is more to getting noticed that what's on the surface. I seem to be the only one on the board who feels that way, but I definitely think there's something to letting your inner person shine.

I think Stacey's hair change illustrates that. She changed her hair, and it made her *feel* different. Maybe she walked into the room with more of a 'look-at-me' attitude as a result, and that - combined with the hair change - is what turned heads.

AJ, enjoying life with C.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Mon, 10-23-2006 - 1:21pm
I know two girls who aren't very pretty at all - they're both very, very plain.

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Mon, 10-23-2006 - 1:41pm
It could be that they seem easy-going and approachable -- less scary than the high-maintenance girls or something.

AJ, enjoying life with C.

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Mon, 10-23-2006 - 7:06pm

Ahh...but do most people you know sparkle?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 10-23-2006 - 10:27pm
When you say sparkle, do you mean being animated or effervescent? By the way, Stacey already mentioned that the two average-looking girls have nice bodies. So, I am not surprised that guys flock at them.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2005
Tue, 10-24-2006 - 9:17am

Thanks, shy.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Tue, 10-24-2006 - 12:17pm

>>Ahh...but do most people you know sparkle? Probably not. That's what takes them away from average. <<

No - that's true. My point was that they might be average in the looks department, but there's more than looks involved with attraction power. :)

AJ, enjoying life with C.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Tue, 10-24-2006 - 12:20pm

When I said "sparkle," I meant the people who seem to smile with their whole body. They glow. They love life. They love themselves. It's just an overall energy that you can't pin down, but it is hugely attractive.

I knew a guy like that - not a great looking guy, but you just wanted to be around him, you know? He felt good and made everyone around him feel good. I still think of him as one of the guys that got away. His wife is a very lucky lady.

From what I can tell, I agree with Shy that Stacey is probably one of those people as well. :)

AJ, enjoying life with C.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 10-24-2006 - 10:31pm
LOL, You sounded quite confident when you said that he "got away".... Now, it is not out of bitterness when I say that often I feel dumb when you guys tell me something. For example, as much as I try to appreciate myself and listen to my body and heart, at the end, I do not love myself any more than I did before. Sorry for the rambling which might have to do with the listless night at the book club. Nonetheless, thanks for the clarification.