Falling in Love with ME ....

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Falling in Love with ME ....
9
Sun, 10-22-2006 - 10:32pm

Earlier today, I signed up a single workshop which claims to teach us how to develop a positive self-image. The description is as followed:

"Did you know that people see us the way we see ourselves? It`s true! That`s why it`s so important to develop a positive self-image. That`s the first - and most important - step in finding someone great. The way you think can affect the way you feel and act. Others can sense it, too. This course is all about the power of positive thinking. You will leave feeling better about yourself and know how to exude this new found confidence. This course is for you if you want to feel more accepted by others: co-workers, friends, men/women you want to date etc. You will learn techniques on how to accept yourself. In order to improve your relationships with others - you must have a healthy relationship with yourself. Learn how to find your own voice, assert yourself, and feel better all around!"

Okay, while I am not a genius, I am a smart guy. Moreover, I have a strong will in that I am willing to go through struggles. However, it does seem that any one else is noticing. What is happening?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2005
Mon, 10-23-2006 - 5:33pm

I'm not sure if I'm reading a typo or not...it does seem or doesn't seem that anyone else is noticing? The clarification will help with my response!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 10-23-2006 - 10:17pm
You are right. It should have been "does not". So much for being a smart guy!
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2005
Tue, 10-24-2006 - 8:26pm

Thanks for the clarification!

My wild guess is that people won't notice. It's not like the huge drastic change in your personality that people you already know will pick up on. Strangers aren't going to notice either because they'll assume this is how you've always been.

"Falling in love with yourself" and really being content with who you are is important for you! You might notice this big change in yourself, that you have more confidence, that you're happier, more willing to try new things, less anxious about conversations with strangers etc etc. I think over time these self improvements will help facilitate better relationships in all areas of your life, including in your search for a significant other.

I can relate a little. For the first time ever I am in love with myself, lol...sounds silly I know. I think spending time with me, trying news things, challenging myself and just be confident in myself as a person. You would think that these revelations would mean I've got people flocking towards me, drawn to my charisma. LOL. Instead I noticed that I'm just happier and content with where my life is. I know that I make a great partner and that when a person comes along that I mesh well with, the happiness I have with myself will only help the relationship along in a healthy direction.

I'm hoping this all makes sense, I feel a bit rambly tonight!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 10-24-2006 - 10:36pm
What does it feel like now that you love yourself? I was just rambling too in another post that as much as I want to appreciate myself (and I do in certain areas), I do not love myself today any more than I did yesterday. At least, it does not feel that way.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2005
Wed, 10-25-2006 - 4:33am
Have you ever tried doing this. Stand in front of a mirror, look at yourself in the eyes and say, "I love you" or "I'm proud of you". Try it, see how it makes you feel.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2005
Wed, 10-25-2006 - 8:37pm

You know, that's an incredibly difficult question to answer. I would have to say it's an overall feeling of contentment, as if I know myself so well and know I won't compromise myself for others. My view point used to be "gosh if they don't like that about me, maybe I'm wrong and should change?". Now I'm likely to say "This is who I am, and there's no need to change just because someone else doesn't like me". I'm okay with being 'by myself', I don't fear 'thinking' because I know my thoughts will be positive and anything negative will be constructive instead of destructive.

Being in love with yourself is equal to a good level of self-esteem. Of course I still have bad day where I just feel like nothing is going my way but I don't blame myself. I see that the negativity is from external forces, not from within my own mind.

I hope that helps a little, it's just a hard feeling to really wrap your thoughts around when you're asked too!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Thu, 10-26-2006 - 12:06am

In general I think that loving yourself is acceptance of who you are, where you came from and where you're going. Sounds kinda corny but its what I believe I guess.

I dont think its something you just "get" or something that just changes from one day to the next. I think its something that continues to evolve and change over the course of your life.

And worthwhile things we do or possess are not often recognized by others and that we have to just live our lives as happily as we can for ourselves.. I think thats one lesson I've learned the most in the last year with all of the turmoil I have experienced with my family. It definitely hit home this weekend as I sat in ICU with my grandfather. I often think about it when it comes to my classmates as well. We're all getting "recognized" in June when we graduate. But I know that my education has been entirely different from theirs in many ways and some of the things I have done will not be recognized. I just gotta do what I gotta do.

Its a good thing that you're doing these workshops and stuff to learn about yourself. Its a good way to make the changes you want to make and have personal insight. Good for you :)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 10-26-2006 - 9:43am
Perhaps I should give more credit to myself and concentrate more on the positive things in my life. Thanks to all!
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-30-2006
Sun, 10-29-2006 - 12:12am

You should watch a TV ad that's running on here. It's of Seven Up's H2O. It's the same story told from two different angles, the boy's one and the girl's. Both personal stories start with "I bla bla bla, and one day something great happened to me: I fell in love with myself. I...” and that's the funny part of the ad, each one tells what they started doing since "they found themselves so cool", and finally they meet and start dating. "And there I was on my own, with my (marvellous) self when.." and they meet.

It made me thought that much as I like this commercial and the many times that I've seen it and it never occurred to me this reflection: both characters found love once they first fell in love with themselves. And I also realize one thing: the boy I like is actually very charismatic. Funny, huh?