just friends

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2007
just friends
4
Sat, 01-27-2007 - 2:15pm

Does anyone have a suggestion on the best way to say (via text because he keeps texting me to hang out) that I'm fine with hanging out but I don't want the guy to have the wrong impression, that I'm not looking for anything right now?

I don't want to just jump to the conclusion that he wants something although his messages have pretty much led me to believe this, but I'm only interested in being friends with guys right now. I just don't know if there's an easy way to say this without sounding bitchy?

Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
In reply to: azure84
Sat, 01-27-2007 - 7:02pm

I wouldn't text, because that seems so impersonal, and- not to offend anyone- lazy.

Avatar for cfk_3
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-1999
In reply to: azure84
Sat, 01-27-2007 - 9:08pm
I know you indicated that you could tell what this guy is looking for from his messages, but if it were me and I still wanted to hang out with him, I would. When and if he starts trying to put the moves on me, I would address the just friends topic with him then. You may risk his getting a little miffed at being rebuffed but you take the same risk if you address it beforehand and he was only joking around in the texts he'd sent you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2006
In reply to: azure84
Mon, 01-29-2007 - 2:33pm

This thread makes me sick. I don't understand. Why are women so hell bent against hooking up with their male friends? Hasn't he been there for you? Hasn't he always been fun?

I was always "just a friend." I wasted YEARS trying to get girls like you to like me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2007
In reply to: azure84
Tue, 01-30-2007 - 10:22am

I'm sorry that my question upset you.

I value my friendships differently than I do my relationships because, like you said, friends are there for you. Guys come and go while friends last forever.

I made the mistake of dating my best guy friend in college and after we broke up (because of his unfaithfulness) he took it out on me and now we no longer speak. Looking back I regret us ever crossing that line because I wish I still had his friendship. I would rather keep my friends than risk a relationship going wrong and losing them from my life completely.