Driving myself nuts!!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-14-2007
Driving myself nuts!!!!!
3
Sun, 09-02-2007 - 12:43am
Does anyone else obsess over dumb things like which toothpaste, hand soap or dvd to buy? It takes me about 20 minutes to pick anything out, im so indecisive! I think i have issues haha.....


Edited 9/3/2007 1:38 am ET by citygal25
Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Sun, 09-02-2007 - 11:21am

I used to, but I think that once you have that first...second...third...really good date with a guy you like never call, you train yourself not to go overboard thinking about him.


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2005
Sun, 09-02-2007 - 1:26pm

I definitely understand. I've been dating a guy a little over a week, we both seem to be very interested in each other, and I have been a bundle of nerves! Well, I've calmed down a lot in the past couple days, but mostly because I've held off on seeing him for a bit.

It may be kind of a downer, but it helps me to think of chemicals when I get this way. Infatuation is a lot of chemicals being released in your brain, and that mix of chemicals is designed to make you feel really good and also really on alert. Also, I heard that your serotonin levels lower, sharpening emotions and even opening the gateway to obsessing. So that would help to explain the overanalyzing and constant comparison with your fairytale dreams. I know I've been doing the exact same thing.

I have been talking a lot about my dates to a couple people, and that sort of helps me get out all the obsessive stuff and gives me some perspective on it. I asked for a little time off from getting together (we had seen each other every day), and I think that has helped me restore my chemical balances a little bit. I still feel excited and happy, but also a little calmer and wiser.

I'd say to just be patient with yourself when this happens and know that your body and mind and heart are just doing their thing, and it's a good thing! But it also doesn't mean that the craziness-inducing guy is or isn't your prince charming. I think that takes time time time to consider and know.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Sun, 09-02-2007 - 1:31pm
I used to do that, too. Even though I knew it was sabotaging everything. Rarely did those relationships work out. Until the last guy I dated. Something was different. I eventually realized that I felt confident in his interest and love for me. I could just *be*, and it felt so good. It felt good to just let the relationship grow and not worry about anything. The relationship did not last, but there was something so different about it. I realized that when you know the other person has genuine feelings for you, you can just let it be and relax and enjoy it. You will know and feel the difference, trust me.