Friend not willing to meet strangers

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2001
Friend not willing to meet strangers
5
Mon, 01-28-2008 - 1:28pm

This is not a terribly serious post by any means but I cannot understand a particular attitude my friend has about going to events where you will meet new people.


There is a potluck happening next weekend that revolves around a certain cause we are all into.

Soliel
Avatar for cfk_3
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-1999
Mon, 01-28-2008 - 6:31pm
I totally get that you aren't judging her too harshly, but I think that sometimes we forget that not everyone is outgoing, adventurous, etc.
Avatar for cl_shywon
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Mon, 01-28-2008 - 6:50pm

Honestly, I don't think you'd ever understand her feelings on the issue unless you've been there- and I have.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2001
Mon, 01-28-2008 - 7:50pm

Here the the thing I forgot to mention in my post:


She is not really the shy on, I am!!!


I am definitely, postively, more introverted than her HANDS DOWN.

Soliel
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2007
Mon, 01-28-2008 - 8:09pm

This is interesting...I can relate to your friend, however...it's hard to put into words...I think I was a little more outgoing when I was "younger"...soon to be 40......I too, am very friendly, and everyone THINKS I am not shy bc I am so friendly..especially at work or a social gathering (which I have not been to many the past couple of years). I used to be the "life of the party" whenever I felt comfortable enough to go...I used to be a flight attendant..so definetely not afraid of meeting strangers...


I just PREFER not to for some crazy reason...hence, maybe why I am still single. For me, it's more of a waste of my time and energy to talk to strangers...hard to explain...ummm...I think there is also the trust issue for me..honesty..sincerity..all of the above...if I do not think they are genuine..I do not care to have conversation with them...STRANNNGE, I KNOW...


I encountered this exact thing a few months ago...I was at happy hour with 2 of my best friends...the bar area was packed..so this single older man (50-60) came in and asked if he could have our table as he could tell we were getting ready to leave...one of my friends had way too much to drink and continued to oblige this stranger in conversation...(she is married)..and she kept giving me the eye...like he is a catch or something...I totally shut down..and got very quiet..I did not want to talk to him or care what he had to say....again, CRAZY, I know. It's just ME, I can't help it....


That's my 2 cents worth....I turn down alot of social gatherings bc I do not care for small talk.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2001
Mon, 01-28-2008 - 8:58pm

I hear you.

Soliel