Feeling Guilty

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Feeling Guilty
2
Thu, 02-03-2005 - 12:24pm
Hello All,
I recd the papers from my paralegal re: the response to the petition my STBX filed. All I have to do is sign them. I don't know why I feel so guilty and wrong for disagreeing w/some of the stuff in the petition. I am asking for more child support and for all our assets to be divided equally. He was going to give me a set amt per month but has not been abiding by that. He said he will start paying it once the divorce is final, in the mean time my son and I suffer. He also did not want to place the community property, assets, or debts incurred on the decree. If this is going to be a divorce, well then I want it to be legal, so my paralegal said to file a response denying his allegations. I have'nt told him about it and I'm not sure if I should, I know if I do, he will go ballistic and right now he has gone his separate way and me mine, and we rarely talk unless it has to do w/our son. Please tell me I am doing the right thing about covering my butt. I'm not sure why I feel so bad about this, he asked for the divorce.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: melrose02
Thu, 02-03-2005 - 3:17pm

Remember, it's not just YOUR butt you are covering, it is your son's as well. No matter what a great parent Stbx may be, you need to get yourself into the state of mind of a future single mom. Looking out for your child is not something you can leave to a husband anymore, if you don't have one. It's up to you. Do it.

Also, from the standpoint of people in the legal business, there is nothing personal about these Petitions and Responses. The accepted strategy is that Petitioner asks for MORE than what is really wanted or even deserved. And the Respondent does the same in their answer. It's just how it is done. There is no shame in following the accepted legal practice. This is not personal. You are not trying to get anything that isn't yours. Sign the papers and let the law take its course. This is only the beginning, keep up your strength.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: melrose02
Thu, 02-03-2005 - 4:23pm
Thanks I totally agree it is just how the law works. Sitting here reading this legal stuff just makes me think that I am entitled to half and that is just how it is. You are right this is for my son and our future. I appreciate the feedback.