IT'S FINALLY OVER....
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| Mon, 02-14-2005 - 5:26am |
Hi, I haven't written to the board in a long while. I finally went to court for child support and I went by myself and was afraid. I didn't think about the divorce because in my state you need to take parenting classes, so when I got their divorce was the last thing on my mind. The judge listend to my case, he never showed up and he told my he wasn't going to. Anyway's, after she listend and asked me questions, she said she granted this much in child support and then like a blow from no where she said, "I'm also granting your divorce," I nearly fainted, I think that was the saddest moment in my life. I didn't see it comming. Maybe that was a good thing it needed to be done, and if I knew I was going for that also, I would of had a panic attack. I stood their alone and crying. I cried for the past, the man who was once a strong man, who now has to be drug tested, I cried for my children and everything they lost and went through, and I cried the whole way home for myself, I loved this man unconditionaly for 12 years. To think that one discison can change your life. I cried thinking about how and what he thought of before taking that first pill, or snorting that first line, and how that one flick of a moment that one wrong discison changed our lives in a matter of an instant. In one instant the judge gave me her discision, It's weird how one little yes or no, do or don't, walk away or stay, can change your life's path. I don't know what I'm feeling, it's hard to explain, I'm not happy or sad, that the life we had is gone. Some of my family and friends congradulated me, some sad their sorry, some said out with the old in with the new. All I can say is I'm 33 have 3 little girls who will no longer have their mom and dad together any more and that is sad, I don't know how to tell my oldest who's 11 who basically know's about what happened. I layed in bed all week end, while they were gone, not knowing how or what to feel, I still don't.
~~Laura~~

I'm so sorry.... I hope that once you get back into your weekly routine that things will seem better.
Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~