need advice and energy even more
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need advice and energy even more
| Wed, 08-17-2005 - 3:30pm |
I am unhappy with myself. I am trying to move out of my house. Things are overwhelming. I feel myself shutting down besides feeling sick and no energy. I just happened to think about D settlement. We do not have any final papers drawn nor do I have an active lawyer. Will it make a difference toward alimony if house is already sold? We are both agreeing on house. I just can NOT cope with it all.

Hi Julie
Only 6 months ago I was in your situation. It is so hard, but please believe me when I say it will get better. It really will!!! I also had no energy, I wasn't eating, I was sad and crying alot, it was terrible. We had to sell our house right away too. I suddenly found myself without my husband, having to find somewhere else to move to which I could afford on my own that would allow me to have my 2 dogs, and I didn't have a car as he got it in the separation. Things were falling apart all over the place for me. I just wanted to close my eyes and then when I opened them for it to be 6 months later. Well, now it is and things are so much better. Its been a long haul but I'm actually happy now. I was able to buy my own condo right in the city so I am close enough to walk everywhere including to work, plus my dogs are allowed there. I also found a wonderful man who adores me and treats me with the love and respect I never got from my husband. I'm still battling with internal emotions and hurts from my marriage and our separation but every day it gets a little better.
Feel free to email me anytime. It really does help to talk about things with someone who has been there and knows what you're going through.
((hugs))
Jess jikaf@hotmail.com
Hi Julie!
First....Pianoguy wants to send you a few hugs! Maybe it's because he has been through a similar scenerio with an EX-WIFE and "The Girlfriend From Hell" with regards to houses and financial settlements.
From a male viewpoint, most of us want to get the particulars down on paper and present them to our lawyer. After this, we hope that our soon-to-be-EX's will come up with their list of priorities. With luck, the two of us can arrive at terms that are FAIR and MUTUALLY SATISFYING TO BOTH OF US?
So PLEASE...get yourself a lawyer or legal advisor whom you can trust...and will understand what your needs are.
As for feeling sick to our stomachs and depressed about the process...MEN go through this too! The only difference is...we don't discuss the ulcers with anybody BUT EXTREMELY CLOSE FRIENDS OR A FAMILY MEMBER OR TWO?
Ending a relationship that began on "a happy note" usually depresses the hell out of most people who are going through the process. . Just keep in mind, that you'll have at least a few months of regret, sadness, anger and frustration once everything has been "signed, sealed and delivered!"
But like the rest of us who have had to put up with preliminary paperwork...intermingled with disagreements and tears...you'll make it through!
Best wishes and warm thoughts (plus the hugs),
Pianoguy