STBX Wants a Child Support Agreement
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| Thu, 08-18-2005 - 4:34pm |
Two weeks ago my STBX received the child support petition that I had served on him. Since that time he has refused to keep his regular visitation schedule with our two sons. Although I was worried that the kids would feel abandoned, we have actually been having a really great time together. They've slept in their own beds all week without the disruption of having to pack and run to STBX's house. They do miss his dog, though, but I've offered to let the dog visit if they want to see him.
Yesterday, STBX drives down my mother's block in a new car. Well, it wasn't really new, but it was a classic 1966 car in excellent condition. I didn't expect to run into him there and was a little peeved that he had the nerve to drive around in another car while he still won't pay the correct amount of child support. He pulls over and tells me that he hasn't been able to sleep at night because he's worried about going to Family Court. In other words, he doesn't want the court to garnish his checks. He asks me to enter into an agreement with him for payment of the child support and wants me to tell him what I need each month to take care of the kids. At first I told him that we could try to reach an agreement, but I still want him to pay what the kids are entitled to. I also want an attorney and will not withdraw the court case until the agreement is filed. Because he's not paying me adequate support, I want him to pay for my attorney as well. STBX just bought a small business last week and I figured that an attorney would be able to find out the profits and fight for the kids rights. If we can't agree on the amount, then back to court we go and his salary will be garnished instead.
Has anyone ever had a similar arrangement? Has it worked out in your favor? I don't want to give STBX an easy way out, but I don't want a long court battle either. I go to see a child support attorney tomorrow.

No, no, no!.... child support calculators are very specific these days, and most states now take into effect everything imaginable when they are computing it..... and it is your children's right!
Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~
Sometimes cs calculations do come out skewed in favor of one person or the other.
A lot of good advice here. Also, figure out how much you need. Include things that are important and that the children had before divorce. If it's an extreme luxury, (horseback riding for instance) perhaps ask for a portion of support for that, but be sure to include things like start-up money for fall school clothes shopping and supplies shopping--these strain the bUdget because you have to buy all at once. One pair of gym shoes can set you back a week's worth of groceries.
Also, pay close attention to your children and not to the other household in terms of what you need. If, for instance, your ex's new wife stays home with the children and so they want a break for that, it's not your problem. She can get a job just like you have to. It's a personal choice and they need to work that out.
If you figure out what you need-which isn't always what you want-your amount will be fair because you will find that you need help with the basics for the children and there's nothing that can change those needs.