STBX would NOT take DS to ER

Avatar for susieyippin
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-07-2003
STBX would NOT take DS to ER
3
Thu, 08-18-2005 - 7:44pm

My son has been working on a car at STBX's garage for the past few weeks. Yesterday, DS and younger DS were at the garage with STBX. Older DS came home around 4:45 saying his dad told him to get the insurance card and drive to the ER. DS had cut his left pinky finger with a grinding wheel. DS was bleeding, and he said that he could see bone, and felt the cartilige moving around. I told him to get in the car, and we were going to the ER, which is about 10 minutes from our house.

So, DS and I are at the hospital for about 3 hours, while he gets stitched up. I had to wait in the waiting room, and he came out about 7:50 p.m. We get in the car, and the poor kid says to me, "Mom can I call dad, so that he doesn't get mad at me for leaving some tools out? And to let him know I'm ok?" I said, sure, here's my phone. So he calls his dad, and he gets the voice mail. He calls the shop phone, and gets the voice mail again. STBX gets EXCELLENT reception on his cell, and forwards his calls from the shop phone to the cell, so he SHOULD have been able to receive our call.

Anyway, I drop DS off at our house, and go to pick up younger DS at his dad's. I get there, and DS isat the 2nd floor window-- "Hey mom, I took a shower. I'm staying at dad's tonight". Fine by me. STBX comes down, DOESN"T ASK ABOUT older DS, but says, "what are you doing here?" DUH. I said, "DS tried to call you, but got the voice mail." He says "Oh, it's after 8, so I turned it off." !!!!!!!!!! I said, "Um, our son was in the ER, and you turned your phone off?" His reply, "He's an adult, he could drive himself." I just could not believe it. Yes, DS is an adult, but he was bleeding, and he drives a standard shift. HOW is he supposed to keep pressure on a deep cut, shift, and operate the car safely?? Why the F couldn't STBX take him to the ER? He could have dropped younger DS off with me.

Something similar happened 2 1/2 weeks ago, when older DS had a severe nosebleed, and STBX had his phone turned off, and I couldn't contact him. He just wants to be a dad when it's convenient for him, like when he can be a hero and take them to the races. My lawyer called this afternoon, and I told her about what happened last night with STBX. She was stunned.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Thu, 08-18-2005 - 10:14pm

Wow!


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

Avatar for susieyippin
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-07-2003
Fri, 08-19-2005 - 8:51am

Yup, that's STBX's behavior right now... he and I had a discussion about our son being an adult a few weeks ago, but STBX is just clueless without my direction. I hate that the kids have to suffer... they think this is normal behavior because they see their father doing it. He was NEVER this thoughtless in regards to the kids' health issues before.

Another thing happened early yesterday evening. Younger DS fell of his bike, and got road rash on his left side-- ear, shoulder (pretty bad), elbow, side/hip, and knees. He was very sore, and we were out of ice cream. I had given him my last dollar earlier, and my older DS was out of cash too. So I called STBX about DS falling off his bike, and to ask him if he could go down the street to the ice cream stand and get a cup for DS. (Soft serve is good for hurts like falling off your bike). He grunted and huffed, and grudgingly got the ice cream for DS. He like to do the fun stuff with the kids-- building cars, going to the races, taking them to the fair.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2005
Fri, 08-19-2005 - 12:36pm

OMG, I would be fuming too.


I have no way of contacting my ex during the day and I NEVER get an answer on the home phone. It's so frustrating.


My daughter ( 13 months old at the time )