Did your marriage end because of infi...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-17-2006
Did your marriage end because of infi...
7
Fri, 03-17-2006 - 9:25am

Did your marriage end because of infidelity?



  • Yes
  • No


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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2004
Fri, 03-17-2006 - 9:30am

Hey debbie,

We werent legally married, just living together but I behaved as a wife in every sense of the word. As a matter of fact today is the two year anniversary. Hell I even saw the OW and her twins. So there is just stuff going on all over today.

Avatar for eatatmoms
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 03-17-2006 - 3:11pm
Can I say kinda??? In my marriage the infidelity that I know of wasn't the cause of the divorce but a symptom of the problem. My ex never had an affair (that I know of) but he tried to and was turned down and then blamed me for being unsympathetic. He is incredibly selfish and has no empathy so that is what killed our marriage. I was willing to stay with him and work on things after the near affair.
Melanie
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2006
Fri, 03-17-2006 - 3:46pm
He blamed you for not sympathizing that he got shot down by another woman? Wow. Congrats on getting rid of that one!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 03-17-2006 - 4:29pm

See me saying "WOW" as I shake my head in disbelief that "he did what?"


My EX said that he kept pushing the infidelity line out farther and farther because he was trying to get a reaction from me... he wanted to to get mad, scream, cry, throw things at him, etc.... because "that would prove that you love me."


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

Avatar for eatatmoms
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 03-17-2006 - 5:24pm

Yup - that's exactly what he did! He told me I was heartless and cruel because I was so upset about him asking another woman out that I hadn't acknowledged his broken heart! He wanted me to comfort him. In his defense (which is very thin...) he is mentally ill, this was just more of the insanity.

Melanie

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2004
Wed, 03-22-2006 - 4:05pm

To be honest, infidelity was the symptom, not the cause, of my martial problems. It sounds cliche but it's true.

Actually I think it's a line from "When Harry Met Sally"--"well, that symptom is f!@#ing my wife."

Avatar for virgogirl914
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 03-22-2006 - 6:24pm

Mine did the same thing (pushing the infidelity boundaries) but for a different reason. He did it knowing I would hit a breaking point and find the strength to end the marriage. . .strength he, himself, didn't have.

The first incident was a one night stand, then there was a 2-3 week affair while he was at a military school in Georgia (and I was home with 3 kids including a newborn), the final straw was falling in love with a 26 year old National Guard member while serving in Iraq and having HER meet him upon his return to the states instead of having the kids meet him.