First weekend without DD

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2006
First weekend without DD
7
Fri, 05-11-2007 - 8:28pm

I feel kind of lost this being the first weekend without DD. It's strange as we have been seperated since last September and divorced since January. However Ex did not have suitable housing for DD to visit so he visited her here - which drove me absolutly crazy.

I have wanted and waited for him to get housing - he finally did and this is her first weekend away. Even though I have been dying for a weekend by myself, it feels so bittersweet. I do have plans - I'm painting a room in my house, hiking with a friend, movie. But still. Did'nt think I'd feel this way.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2006
Sat, 05-12-2007 - 11:49am

This is my first weekend without my girls too but since tomorrow is mother's day, I get them for tomorrow. My first full weekend without them will be memorial day weekend. A three day weekend. That is going to be tough to take.

The one thing I can't come to terms with WRT this divorce is having to share my kids. I hate it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2006
Sat, 05-12-2007 - 2:15pm

Same here - DD is coming back tomorrow and then will be gone the long memorial day weekend.

It's funny, I hate the sharing yet I so value some free time. I feel a bit lost today even though went to the gym, have yard work to do and painting as well. In addition to plans tonight.

When I called to talk to DD she was out playing with a new friend she made in her dads new neighborhood. I want her to have a good time, yet again - not "that" good a time.

Sigh - I'm sure we'll all get through it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Sun, 05-13-2007 - 3:08am

It's hard.

Visit CFL

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2006
Sun, 05-13-2007 - 6:12am

You sound so much like me. I love free time but HATE sharing my kids. STBX is 100 times more involved with them now and I know that's a good thing but I HATE to share. Those are MY babies, lol.

Ditto on having a good time but not THAT good a time. I'm working on getting over that because my kids have to be free to have a good time at both parents houses. I just hope this isn't some kind of honeymoon period where after the dust settles he goes back to his old ways. Leopards don't change their spots this easily.

I'm planning on doing some painting over memorial day weekend. That and hanging out with every friend/relative that will put up with me, lol. I have to do this for my kids. I keep telling them that if they get a sober dad who actually spends time with them it's a good thing but it sure doesn't seem like a good thing that I have to miss so much time with my kids now.




Edited 5/13/2007 6:18 am ET by gr8fulmom1
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2004
Sun, 05-13-2007 - 8:37am
I know exactly what you're saying. Logically, I understand it's good for my son to spend time with his dad, especially after so many years of dealing with his absence. But still, it does feel like a loss. I often feel sad about the time I miss.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2007
Sun, 05-13-2007 - 3:04pm
Hi gals, hang in there. My ex moved far away had no contacrt with his kids. I tried to keep kids in touch with his parents. They came around when they wanted to. Dad wanted no contact with kids. Then when they became adults, he couldn't get enough of them.
Today (Mother's Day) is very painful for my son and myself. His fiancee took off with his child, moved about 500 miles away. My son is barely allowed to see his son, and today is grandsons B'day. When I say see, on computer only. He is going after custody. She will not allow him to take son for any time. Plus my son doesn't have the money to travel. So keep a happy thought. You are doing a good thing for your child. It will all come back to you some day. Kids need both parents. Hope your day is a happy one.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2007
Sun, 05-13-2007 - 7:56pm
I have been divorced since Nov. 2006. Our children are 18 and 11. They have stayed with their father once since due to the housing situation and he can't seem to get a weekend free for them to stay now that they can stay with him. I know exactly how you feel. I too had similar plans, but it was so unbearable without them here. They have stayed with friends and I've been home alone before, but it was hard because I knew where they were. It hurts, I just hope time heals all. Good luck to you