I finally decided to do it- now what?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-25-2003
I finally decided to do it- now what?
14
Tue, 01-15-2008 - 3:57pm

My DH and I have been together for 8 years and married for about 4.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008
Tue, 01-15-2008 - 6:32pm
OMG I feel like I wrote much of that post! Ever since telling DH that I want a separation he has completely gone over the top with the neediness, clinginess, flowers, love notes, gushing, etc. All the things I wish he would have done when it might have made a difference! I am telling you this because if your DH is already borderline obsessed with you, it might get worse once he realizes that his fears of losing you might actually become reality. Be prepared for this, and don't let him change your mind! Stand firm! My guilt over not feeling the same way as him while he was trying SO hard
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-25-2003
Tue, 01-15-2008 - 7:29pm

We're in counseling - again- because he wants us there.


Only now after I just told him I'm afraid this isn't going to work out he thinks we should get a different counselor.


He isn't listening to me.


He wants me to tell him what is standing between me coming back to "us".

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-25-2003
Wed, 01-16-2008 - 11:45am

So after he sent me an e-mail asking me what stood between me and "coming back"

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-16-2008
Wed, 01-16-2008 - 4:48pm

WOW,


iVillage Member
Registered: 07-25-2003
Wed, 01-16-2008 - 5:17pm

did you live together for the full 6 months of that time?


I really think we need to start taking a serious look at our assets.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-16-2008
Wed, 01-16-2008 - 6:02pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-25-2003
Wed, 01-16-2008 - 7:51pm

The problem is that if I could flip the switch and love him again and want this relationship then yes I'd want it because we have a child together and that "family" is what I had wanted.


I just wasn't prepared for me to change so significantly after becoming a mom.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2008
Mon, 01-21-2008 - 11:24am

I can so relate to all of these post, and I feel for you!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-25-2003
Mon, 01-21-2008 - 12:26pm

I hate giving any credit to "balls".

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2008
Mon, 01-21-2008 - 12:53pm

I understand what you are saying about the sex thing...it is no longer for us either, and it was a HUGE part of our relationship-at least from his point of view.

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