At my wits end
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| Wed, 01-16-2008 - 7:43pm |
Hello all....I read all the time but barely post...I'm at my wits end...Brief background...been divorced 5 years, 2 children ages 13 and 8. My divorce was a very nasty one and since in the last year fought and won a nasty custody battle. I'm a good mom, I know I am...but I'm just going nuts and feel so alone. I work full time, struggle to keep the finances in order, ex is forever giving me a hard time, he's a huge drama queen, I have a boyfriend but he's long distance. My kids are great, really they are so why do i have such a hard time with them? My temper is short...when i get about something, I go into this full blown rage, screaming, cursing, throwing things, you name it...I full feel so overwhelmed at times. Everything is on my shoulders...everything and I just don't know how much longer I can keep doing this.
I hate when I get like that, it never lasts long and then within a few minutes i'm hugely regretfuly. I always apologize to the kids...but I can't keep doing this. It's not normal! Can anyone else relate? Anyone else do this?
There is obviously more to my life than this but I don't know how much to share....Need some friends I guess and support.

Wildfire,
It sounds like your anger is coming from the fact that you feel like your life is completely out of your control. If at all possible you should try to find a professional to talk to about all this, even if you have to join a group, you are probably taking on too much for yourself right now and you are taking it out on the only ones around to hear you - your children.
Without knowing your particular situation I really can't give you much advice but I will say this, anger tends to come up when our boundaries have been crossed. In what ways are you letting others cross those boundaries? You can't control your ex, but you can come up with strategies to stop him from overstepping his bounds with you. The same for your children. They need to be very clear on what you expect from them and you need to warn them the minute they cross the line and have a plan for