NOW he wants me back
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| Wed, 05-21-2008 - 10:25am |
Hello everyone.
A little over a month ago, my husband wanted out of the marriage because I didn't go get a job that paid more money when he ordered me to and he said that we fought about the same things for years. I moved out, and he even helped me move. He felt this way all the way up until he was served with divorce papers on Friday. Two minutes after he is served, he is e-mailing me asking me if the marriage can be saved.
Why, why is he doing this to me?????
I told him to sign the original settlement agreement and we proceed. We sell the house since it was a big problem in the marriage as far as costing too much, and we go to counseling. He is doing what I ask of him, but I wonder what it was that changed his mind?? I would like to think he realized he

Sounds like you called his bluff and now he's backing down. But that doesn't mean you have to go along.
Why would you want to stay with a man who orders you to do things you don't want to do?
I agree with you, however, our marriage wasn't always like this. This is what I am taking in to consideration. This past 3 years has been very difficult for us financially and a lot of huge changes occurred. We moved out of state for starters during the time when the housing market was a sellers market. We bought a house at a much higher price than what it is really worth and didn't count on the gas prices going up so high and the food. He is worried about money, and so am I, but he thought that me getting a better job would take care of it. The problem is, I did put my resume out there and there are no better jobs here for what I do.
We have had communication problems in the past, and he is very difficult to read. He gets angry at me because I try and read him. He is a very quiet person.
Our marriage was happy until we moved down to Florida and the stress lessened our communications with each other. He is willing to go through with the divorce if that's what I want to do and start over if that is what it takes to save us. He is already started counseling and realized how much he missed me and how much he is losing. I can halt the divorce for a little while, and I'll know more in a month than I know today. For now, I am going to try and save my marriage because I want to, and hope that God will guide me in the right direction and help keep my head on straight.
I want to thank everyone for their concerns, prayers, and advice. I will keep you updated as I go along. I am very scared, but know what I want in life. HUGS to everyone!!!!
I'd like to chime in and give you what pîece of advice i have, because i've lived it, somewhat.
I left my EX 4 yrs ago after 26 yrs together.
Hi worstyear,
This is a tough call.
My first reaction to all of this is that this was a fight for control and no one backed down, or more to the point, he was expecting you to back down and you did not.
So long as no one has done something beyond repair (cheating, drugs, addiction, gambling etc), I'd put the divorce on hold.
I would have you both seek counseling.